


Mizpah

by brightlikeloulou



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Good Anakin Skywalker, Hurt/Comfort, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mpreg, Pregnant Obi-Wan Kenobi, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:41:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28163355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brightlikeloulou/pseuds/brightlikeloulou
Summary: Anakin Skywalker pledges himself to Darth Sidious to save his lover’s life. Obi-Wan Kenobi fakes his death and disappears to Tatooine to protect his unborn children.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 37
Kudos: 199





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Español available: [Mizpah](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29696934) by [MeiHL98 (Asura_Tepes)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asura_Tepes/pseuds/MeiHL98)



> Welcome to my new fic, Mizpah. 
> 
> Mizpah:  
> \- The deep emotional bond between people, especially those separated by distance or death.

The emotions that flow through his body feel akin to a storm, raging and devastating, the result of building anticipation as the storm rolled in, a beginning like quiet thunder and distant lightning before evolving into utter chaos: betrayal, anger, fear, and a sickening understanding of what he must do.

Anakin’s knees hit the floor of the office with a loud thud and a sharp pain that slowly dissipates after a few seconds. The traffic continues alongside the Senate Building unbothered, completely ignorant to the events that had just taken place inside; their beloved Chosen One, the hero with no fear, was about to pledge himself to the Sith Lord that was responsible for the galaxy’s devastation.

Mace Windu lies unconscious in the corner of the office, his face pillowed on his bicep before his arm abruptly ends where Anakin had severed it. Sidious had knocked him unconscious with his Force lightning. Anakin can still sense the Jedi Master’s presence in the Force, but it was weakening; if he wasn’t seen to by a healer soon, he’d die. 

He’d succeeded in fighting Darth Sidious’ temptations at first, hence why he’d returned to the Temple to report The Chancellor’s true identity and returned with Mace and the others to arrest him. He was sure he could find another way to save Obi-Wan, a way that didn’t demand he trade his life in return, but when faced with the prospect of Sidious’ death when he was Anakin’s only known way of saving the man he loved, primal instincts had taken over. 

_ “I have the power to save the one you love.”  _

_ “You must choose.”  _

And he had chosen, for Anakin could not lose Obi-Wan. 

“Just help me save Obi-Wan’s life. I can’t live without him,” he whimpers. Sidious continues with a speech about power and the dark side that Anakin barely listens to, too preoccupied with thinking of Obi-Wan, hoping that once he learns how to save his Master, he can get the man to forgive him too. 

“Henceforth, you will be known as Darth Vader,” Darth Sidious finally finishes his speech, and Anakin manages to thank him while attempting to swallow down the bile rising in this throat, "Rise," he commands, and Anakin obeys.

Though very aware that he’d just pledged himself to a Sith Lord, Anakin did not expect his first set of orders from Sidious, and he knew within minutes that he could not obey his first order. He could not go to The Temple and slaughter all of the Jedi that remained there, including the Padawans and younglings. He could Force himself to kill all the Separatist leaders, but he could no return to The Temple, the place that had given him a home, the people that raised him, the children he'd helped train and slaughter them; Obi-Wan was the only exception Sidious allowed. So, Anakin had come up with a plan as to how to spare the Jedi.

Surprisingly, Anakin’s plan went without a hitch. Anakin left the Senate building with an unconscious Mace Windu, who Sidious had demanded he’d take with him, as the Sith Lord’s plan included the transportation of the Jedi’s bodies to Mustafar to dispose of them in the ocean of lava. He said it would completely erase them from the Force and therefore weaken the influence of the light side in the galaxy. Sidious had directed him to the Senate's landing pad, where his 'new gift' was waiting for him; Anakin found a platoon of Clones and a ship, the Lieutenant introducing himself by his designation number, and stated that the platoon was in Anakin's service to follow his every order. Anakin had smiled just slightly and proceeded to tell them to load up, one of the troopers taking Windu from where he was slung over Anakin’s shoulders. 

They landed the ship near the front entrance of The Temple, and Anakin proceeded to collect Windu and order the troops to stay where they were and to have no communication with Sidious; he'd been surprised when not one clone had questioned his orders, but it proved the Lieutenant was telling the truth when he'd stated they'd follow his every order. Anakin took the emergency speeder from the ship, loaded Windu into it, and took off after slathering bacta he'd found onto the Master's burnt stump.

The rest of the plan was simple; drop off Mace and give him strict instructions to evacuate The Temple and fake their deaths, then Anakin would stay with the troops for roughly however it would take one to slaughter an entire Order so the ship's navigation wouldn't look suspicious if Sidious had it checked. Then he would proceed to Mustafar. Even though Anakin did despise the Separatist leaders, he didn't want to kill them, it wasn't the Jedi way, but he couldn't fake the slaughter of the Jedi and the Separatists. He'd much rather spare his fellow Jedi than those that had been his enemies for the past three years. It was then that he realised that technically they weren't his fellow Jedi because he had pledged himself to a Sith Lord.

He lands the speeder on one of The Temple's isolated, lesser-known, almost secret landing pads on the building's right side. He removes himself from the speeder and moves to stand at the edge, looking out at the business of Coruscant; the city had no idea what would have come by morning. Anakin breathes in deeply, closing his eyes as he focuses on the Force around him. He can feel it’s unsettlement. He reaches across his and Obi-Wan’s Force bond, sending a wave of affection to his lover and the weakness in which it is returned moments later, tells him Obi-Wan is still far away on Utapau, and at that moment, he isn’t sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

He pulls back from the Force and finds that Windu, who had started to stir during the last few minutes of the trip, was now gripping the side of the speeder and sitting up the seat. Anakin rushes over to him, "Master Windu," he greets as he grabs him by the shoulders and helps him out of the speeder.

Windu grips him back tightly with his remaining hand, blinking rapidly as he gains his bearings and then suddenly shouts in pain, looking down at his severed forearm and gripping the flesh just before the wound, collapsing back against the speeder, “Skywalker!” he exclaims, “You took my hand!” 

“Windu, listen to me!” Anakin hisses, the tone of his voice enough to make Windu freeze, gasping and sweating but looking Anakin in the eye, “Sidious wants to eradicate the Jedi Order. He sent me here to slaughter you all, but I couldn’t. He believes you are dead. You need to get everyone out of here, somewhere safe, where they can’t be found. Do you understand me?” 

Windu gasps once, “Skywalker, why did he send you to slaughter the Jedi?” he asks, but he already knows the answer. Anakin swallows down the painful lump in his throat, blinks away the stinging in his eyes. 

“You won’t understand,” he says, and he can hear the fear in his own voice, “I had to pledge myself to him, Master, you wouldn’t understand, I had to take your hand to stop you from killing from him, I need him.” 

“You are a Jedi!” Windu near-screams at him, Anakin feels spittle land on his cheek. 

“I am helping you,” Anakin hisses, anger burning inside of him at the older Jedi’s defiance, “If you want what’s left of the Jedi Order to survive, you need to go and evacuate everyone that’s here and contact those still spread across the galaxy. Sidious wants all Jedi dead; do you understand me? He wants them extinct!”

It takes a few seconds, but Windu eventually nods, fingers digging into the flesh of his forearm, “I understand,” he murmurs, his face was getting paler by the minute, “I understand, I’ll get them out.” 

“When you contact Obi-Wan, I need you to tell him to go to Mustafar. That’s where I’ll be. I need you to send him there,” Windu looks at him as if he’s insane, “I need to speak to him. He will want to speak to me,” Anakin leans close, a growl sitting low in his throat, and his hands itch to wrap his hands around Windu’s throat and choke him until he agrees to pass on his message. Still, he knows that would be the opposite of effective, so he takes a deep breath to calm himself and gets out of Windu’s space, “Master Windu, please.”

“I will tell him, but I cannot promise you he will come,” Windu eventually agrees and shoves himself out of Anakin’s space, moving to the blast door that leads into The Temple. Anakin sighs, relieved, knowing Obi-Wan will definitely come and climbs back into the speeder. As he turns on the speeder, Windu calls him, "Skywalker, who's side are you on?" 

Anakin stares at him, feeling a dull ache in his stomach and an urge to lower his head in shame, to hide from the scrutinizing gaze of the older Jedi that he'd known since he was a little boy, "Obi-Wan's," he replies finally and takes off.

* * *

Mustafar is a hellish planet, blistering hot with fiery shores and oceans of lava. 

It took him and the clones only twenty minutes to kill the Separatist leaders in the fortress. A trained Jedi Knight and forty clones with blasters left the Separatists no chance of survival, especially since most of them were half asleep. They'd risen from their beds to the chaos caused by the initial killing of the guards stationed at the entrance and just inside the fortress. Anakin had completely dissociated himself from his actions, ignoring what a horrible thing it was and focusing on getting it done before Obi-Wan arrived. He couldn't allow his Master to see him do this. 

Once finished, Anakin instructed the Clones to stay inside the fortress and search for any surviving Separatists. Then, their only order was to remain inside the fortress until he told them they were heading back to Coruscant. Not one clone had questioned his orders or the fact they'd come here without the bodies of the Jedi Order; the extent of their reliability he would not have received from Rex or any of the 501st. He knew that these clones had to have been trained differently, in programs he suspected were designed specifically by Sidious, and he hated to think what it entailed. 

Anakin exited the fortress quickly afterward; the place was swimming in the dark side, making his head pound and filling him with an almost irresistible urge to run. He found a patch of black sand that was far enough away from the shores that its heat on his backside wasn't too unpleasant but still close to the landing pad. Hooking his arms over his knees, he stares out at the lava ocean, watching as the orange and black liquid melts over itself. He finally allows himself to think about the events that had taken place over the last two hours, and within seconds, he began sobbing. 

* * *

Anakin sits on the patch of sand for two and a half hours before the ship appears above him; it's closer than he expected as usually the noise of a starship would alert one to its presence, but Mustafar was a noising planet with lava popping and crackling so loudly that the ship had gone undetected. Anakin stands quickly, and his comm buzzes against his hip; as he stares down the ship, he pulls it out and accepts the transmission. 

"Sir, do you still order we remain inside?" The Lieutenant asks over the comm, his voice calm but obviously torn between following Anakin's orders and his responsibility to keep Anakin alive. 

"Yes, and under no circumstances is he to be harmed, understood?" 

"Yes sir," he replies, and Anakin tucks the comm away just as the ship sets down. Anakin steps onto the landing pad, his boots clicking against the metal. 

He can sense Obi-Wan's Force signature, but he finds the man's shields are completely up and Anakin has no way in. It makes Anakin whimper quietly in his throat, never had Obi-Wan cut him off from their bond like he was right now. He often had his shields up, but never to the point that communication was completely restricted. 

The loading door lowers, and Obi-Wan appears at its top; his robes are dirty and ripped, clearly not having changed since his battle against Grievous. His hair is a mess too, and Anakin wants to fix it for him.

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin says as the man begins down the ramp, his throat thick with fear and anticipation. Anakin speaking his name seems to stir something in the older Jedi, and he leaps the rest of the way off the ramp and runs to him. Anakin whimpers when Obi-Wan’s arms wrap around his shoulders and pull them together; Anakin envelopes him and thinks _everything will be okay._ He presses his nose to Obi-Wan’s neck and inhales, smelling sweat and the scent of his skin, holding him as tight as he possibly can as Obi-Wan trembles against him, but when he prods against the older man’s shields, desperate for access, Obi-Wan recoils. 

“Anakin,” he breathes, hands tight on his forearms, “What have you done?”

“Master,” Anakin whimpers; even though he’d been knighted almost two years ago, he still called Obi-Wan Master, especially in times when he wanted to show the older man respect, wanted his forgiveness, or as he often was, overwhelmed by his own mind, “What has Windu told you?” he asks, and tries to blink away the tears that are forming in his eyes. 

Obi-Wan steps away from him, a scowl coming over his face and when Anakin tries to follow, he takes another step back, “Windu has told me,” he begins, his voice so full of anger that Anakin freezes, “That not only did you sever his arm, you have pledged yourself an apprentice to the Sith Lord that has been tearing apart this galaxy!” Obi-Wan’s words cut through his chest like a knife, and by the time he finished the sentence, he was near-screaming. 

Anakin tries to reach for Obi-Wan again, but the man takes another step back, “Master, I’m sorry, I had to,” he starts to explain, but Obi-Wan cuts him off. 

“You had to?” He hisses, “You did not have to do anything. You chose to betray the Jedi Order, to betray me!” the amount of pure rage in the older man’s voice has Anakin wanting to throw up and then beg for his forgiveness, “You were the chosen one! It was said you would destroy the Sith, not join them!”

Anakin shakes his head, his eyes stinging so intensely until finally hot, thick tears slide down his cheeks, “No, Master, I didn’t betray you; I’m doing this for you,” he says. Obi-wan opens his mouth to start shouting again, so Anakin hurries to keep talking, “I’ve told you, I have seen your death every night when I close my eyes. Sidious knows of a power that can save you, that will cheat your death.” 

“They’re just dreams, Anakin!”

“No! They feel like the visions I had of my mother, and they have gotten worse each night.”

“You are acting from fear, not your head!” 

Anakin launches forward quickly before Obi-Wan can move away and cups the older man’s face in his gloved hands, “I am acting from my heart,” he says, and to his surprise, Obi-Wan doesn’t push him away, instead, blue eyes gaze into his own, “I love you too much to ever lose you. I could not do nothing and wait for you die the horrible death I have seen,” he whispers. Gloved thumbs wipe at the wetness beneath Obi-Wan’s eyes before he leans down and presses their lips together.

He kisses Obi-Wan gently, cradling his head in place, and after a moment, he feels the older Jedi’s hands on his waist as Obi-Wan finally returns the pressure against Anakin’s mouth. Anakin slides his flesh-hand further back to slip into Obi-Wan’s hair, feeling the sweat of his scalp as the kiss deepens, and he tries to pour every ounce of love and care into their kiss. 

They finally part after a few minutes, resting their foreheads together, panting softly, and breathing in the same humid air, “I can’t let my visions happen, Obi-Wan,” Anakin whispers against the other man’s mouth.

“They are dreams,” Obi-Wan retorts. He slips away from Anakin again and begins to pace back and forth across the landing pad “dreams inspired by your anger, your fear of losing what you’re attached to; to me, our relationship. I never should have indulged myself. Our relationship was a mistake, Anakin, if this is its inevitable end.”

Anakin sobs then, loud and pained, and finally collapses to his knees. His lover, proclaiming their relationship to be a mistake, fills his heart with such sadness it feels like it could kill him, “No, Master, please. You’re in danger. I need to save you. I can’t live without you.” 

Obi-Wan stops, looking out at the pools of lava, before he turns to Anakin, regarding him for a moment before approaching him again. He stands tall above him, tearful eyes looking down into Anakin’s own. Anakin nudges against the bond a final time and finds the shields are tighter than ever. He drops his head, tears dribbling out when he squeezes his eyes closed. 

A gentle, warm hand on his cheek encourages him to look up again, and he doesn’t need a Force bond to see the disappointment Obi-Wan is feeling. He leans into the older man’s hand, savours its warmth and kisses the fatty flesh of it.

“I love you, Anakin, but I cannot follow you on this path. I will not come with you,” his cool, calm, collected voice answers the unasked question.

Anakin shakes his head rapidly, grabbing Obi-Wan’s hips tightly as he rose partially, “Master, you must! Sidious can save you!” 

“He fills your head with lies, Anakin!” Obi-Wan exclaims, stepping away from Anakin as if he’d burned him, “I am not in danger from anything that healers can save me from.” 

“Obi-Wan, I have seen it,” Anakin sobs, the metal of the landing pad burning his knees through the fabric of his pants, but he doesn’t dare stand. He often kneeled for Obi-Wan in their relationship to show his respect, submission, love; whatever, it didn’t matter. Sometimes he did it for the sake of it, because it was comfortable, and it made him feel safe when he could rest his head against Obi-Wan’s muscular thighs. His Master would card his fingers through his curly hair, and for a little while, Anakin would forget about the chaos of The Clone Wars. 

Obi-Wan’s hands tremble, and he clenches his fingers into fists as if to stop it. His lips quiver around bared teeth, “If it is true what you see, I would rather die than be saved by the dark side,” he says. 

“Please,” Anakin cries, loud and painful, his chest jolting with it and snot dribbles from his nose as he becomes hysteric, “Master, you cannot leave me, I can’t live without you, please!” 

Obi-Wan lifts a hand to his face, hides his eyes, and cries, two loud sobs that tear their way into Anakin’s heart, “I will not condemn this, Anakin, if you want to be with me, then you must leave with me, now.” 

“Obi-Wan, I can’t let you die.”

Looking at Obi-Wan and seeing the look of utter devastation that comes over his face, and then a calm that unsettles Anakin’s stomach, but before he can ask, he feels their bond open up and a wave of pure, undying love meets him. Anakin gasps as it envelopes him, and then it’s gone, and Anakin feels himself being thrown through the air. 

He lands fifty-yards or so away from Obi-Wan’s ship in the hot sand, meeting it with a groan as the wind is knocked out of his lungs. It takes him a few seconds, but he rolls onto his hands and knees in time to see Obi-Wan disappearing up the loading ramp of his ship, and it clicks what’s occurring. The ship roars to life as Anakin scrambles to his feet, beginning to charge after the slowly rising ship, screaming his throat raw. By the time he reaches the landing pad, the ship is too far, and all he can do is crane his neck to look up at it, sobbing loudly and screaming Obi-Wan’s name. 

* * *

Obi-Wan can’t bear to look as Mustafar's surface gets smaller and smaller beneath the ship, Anakin’s figure becoming nothing more but a spot on its fiery surface. His shields are impossibly tight, blocking off all communication that he knows Anakin would be trying to send through, a desperate begging for him to return, to not leave him. Obi-Wan’s heart feels like it’s been ripped in two, a splintering pain that pounds in his chest and tears a cry from his throat; his dear lover had betrayed him and everything he stood for in the hopes of saving him from a death that he had no solid proof would occur. Obi-Wan had traveled to Mustafar in a haze after receiving the message from Master Windu, and it wasn’t until he saw Anakin, beautiful as ever but the Force horribly dark around him that he finally _felt_ , and it _hurt._

He loved Anakin, he loved him so much, he thought he would have done absolutely anything for the younger man, still would, but he couldn’t follow him in advancing the galaxy into the dark. He knew Anakin though, he knew today would not be the end; Anakin wouldn’t just let him go, especially when he strongly believed his life was in danger. He feels completely lost and utterly heartbroken. 

Finally, he screams and then collapses to the floor of the ship. He tugs at his hair, tucking his knees to his chest, and begins to cry. He cries harder than he ever has in his life, harder than when Qui-Gon died, harder than when Anakin lost his arm and he knew it was his fault, harder than when Satine died in his arms, harder than when he lost fifty clones in the span of twenty-minutes because he made the wrong decision. He cries, sobs, and weeps until he’s hyperventilating, unable to breathe, and his head pounds with a pressure headache. He continues to cry until he’s approaching Coruscant. 

* * *

_ The Temple was bigger than he ever could have imagined. Obi-Wan had told him all about it when they travelled from Tatooine, but his descriptions were unmatched to the sheer size of it. It had area for anything he could ever think of, including a massive Cantina that Obi-Wan promised he could always get food from at any time without having to pay credits, that he’d never go hungry again. Anakin had been most excited about the hangar they had landed in when they first arrived three months ago. As soon as he was off the starship they’d travelled in, he was almost dancing on his feet to run around and explore all the different kinds of ships and speeders, to ask the mechanics dozens of questions, but before he had the chance, Obi-Wan told him younglings were prohibited in the hangars unless accompanied by a senior Jedi or were there for lessons. Anakin had opened his mouth to argue, but the stern look Obi-Wan cast him made him think better of it and be on his best behaviour. _

_ His Master’s favourite place in the Temple was the gardens, and while Anakin admits they are pretty, there aren’t any cool ships there. Obi-Wan had taken great delight in showing Anakin around the gardens, pointing out what areas were his favourite to mediate in and giving him lessons on all the different fauna, such as where they came from and their history. His Master liked flowers, that much was obvious, so Anakin had picked him a flower that Obi-Wan said was from Kashyyyk, where Wookies came from. Anakin liked Wookies; there was one in his classes called Toshk, he was the only other youngling that was nice to Anakin, and since their language wasn’t one they would be taught in their studies, Obi-Wan had taken him to the archives to download a guide to the language onto his personal datapad so he could learn to better communicate with his friend. The flower was light blue, with a lot of petals, and when he’d handed it to his Master, it was the widest he’d seen him smile since Master Qui-Gon died.  _

_ Anakin yawns as he punches in the code to his and Obi-Wan’s quarters. Today had been all practical lessons, which meant more physical exertion than he was used to, so he was exhausted, ready to have something to eat and then go to bed. Maybe his Master would let him ignore his homework today.  _

_ “Hi, Master,” He greets as he kicks off his boots, Obi-Wan looking over at him from the kitchenette where he was stirring something on the stove.  _

_ “Hello, Padawan. How was your day?”  _

_ “Long,” Anakin whines, hugging Obi-Wan from behind, pressing his cheek against his back. He feels his Master stiffen for a moment because apparently, it wasn’t proper for a youngling to hug their Master, but Anakin thought that was silly. His Master deserved a hug.  _

_ Obi-Wan hums after a moment, unlatching Anakin and turning to face him, “Yes, I suspect it was,” he replies, ruffling Anakin’s hair, “Go and shower while I finish this up, alright?”  _

_ Anakin huffs but nods and makes his way to the fresher.  _

_ When he returns, Obi-Wan is sat at the table, a steaming bowl of pasta in front of him, and another at Anakin’s place. He sits down and begins shovelling the pasta into his mouth. Obi-Wan wasn’t a very good cook, but back on Tatooine, all he and his mother would eat were rations, so to have hot meals, whether it was his Master’s bad cooking the plain food from the Cantina, he appreciated it.  _

_ “Slow down,” His Master tells him firmly, and Anakin glares up at him over his bowl but smiles when Obi-Wan reaches over and tucks his padawan braid behind his ear. Obi-Wan then leans back and reaches into his robes, pulling out a small envelope, and Anakin lights up, “This arrived today from your mom.”  _

_ Anakin bubbles with excitement as he foregoes his food for the letter, ripping it open and unfolding the paper. Anakin had been told by the Council when he was first accepted into the Order that he would have to remove himself from all attachments if he were to be a Jedi, as attachments were forbidden by the Code. Though he’d agreed, it broke his heart to think he would have to forget his mother. However, when he and his new Master returned to their quarters, Obi-Wan had sat him down and explained he’d already organised with his mother that they would be able to exchange letters every few weeks to stay in touch. Obi-Wan told him he didn't expect Anakin to just forget about his mother since he'd been raised by her, unlike the other younglings in The Temple who had never known their parents; Anakin later learned it was a part of the Order Obi-Wan disagreed with. The letters came every two to three weeks or so to Obi-Wan's friend Dex's restaurant, where he would pick them up from so nobody at The Temple would think something was amiss.  _

_ In the letter, his mother asks how life is in The Temple, responds to what he had said in his previous letter, and asks an abundance of questions. She told him about the new dress she’d bought from the markets and that someone new moved in next door and they were becoming friends. It was a simple letter, but it makes Anakin’s eyes wet all the same, and Obi-Wan uses a napkin to wipe the tears away from his cheeks.  _

_ “Thank you, Master,” he murmurs and folds the paper again.  _

_ “Of course, dear one,” Obi-Wan says, and then motions to Anakin’s bowl of pasta, “Now eat, and once you’ve done your homework, you can write back to Shmi.”  _

_ Anakin groans as he picks up his fork, remembering his empty stomach, “Come on, Master, can’t I skip the homework?” he near-begs, looking up at Obi-Wan with wide, hopeful eyes. _

_ “Absolutely not,” his Master replies, “You’re behind enough as it is starting as late as you have. You need to work as hard as you can.”  _

_ Anakin swears at him under his breath in Huttesse, smirking when Obi-Wan looks over at him with a glower. Obi-Wan was familiar with many languages, but Huttesse wasn’t one of them until recently when he’d decided to make it the next language he’d learn given Anakin’s history, and that the Hutts seemed like they would be an ongoing issue within the galaxy. Anakin knew that Obi-Wan had only taught himself a few basic phrases so far, and that didn’t include curse words. He’d gotten a lecture when swearing in Galactic Basic in front of Obi-Wan, so he’d resorted to Huttese instead. _

_ His Master looks at him a little longer, “Eat, Ani,” he says finally and returns to his own food.  _

_ * _

_ “Anakin, you should knock before entering someone’s private room,” Obi-Wan says, not looking up from where he sits on his bed, his legs under the covers and his fingers tapping away at his datapad.  _

_ “Sorry, Master,” Anakin replies and jumps onto the bed beside his Master, something else Obi-Wan had told him wasn’t proper behaviour, but yet didn’t outright protest to it. Anakin holds out the couple of pages he’d prepared for his mother, “I finished my letter and drawing for mom. Can you check the spelling?”  _

_ Obi-Wan puts down the datapad and takes the papers, Anakin’s drawing of Toshk being on top; when his mother had said she didn’t know what a Wookie looked like in her last letter, he decided to show her, “I don’t think your mother would mind about your spelling,” Obi-Wan says, picking up a pencil from his nightstand.  _

_ “I want her to know I’m learning,” Anakin replies, lying against his Master’s side to watch as he made a few corrections, “Can I sleep here?” he asks softly, fisting his hands into the sheets nervously. He knew it was silly, and he was too old to not sleep in his own bed, but he struggled to sleep at night, and it made him miss his mom a lot. When he missed his mom, being around Obi-Wan made it feel better.  _

_ His Master sighs and is quiet for several moments before finally replying, “Okay, but this is the last time.”  _

_ Anakin nods, curling against Obi-Wan’s side more and closing his eyes, smiling happily, “Okay.”  _

_ It was far from the last time Anakin fell asleep at his Master’s side.  _

* * *

Flying over The Temple, Obi-Wan could sense it, a Force signature desperately trying to conceal itself but failing to his carefully trained abilities. He hadn’t spoken to anyone from The Temple since travelling from Utapau to Mustafar when he’d been informed by a very weak Windu, and then Cody once Windu had collapsed, what had happened, and that the Jedi were going to proceed with an evacuation to their emergency location. Before the evacuation, the emergency location’s whereabouts was only disclosed to Council Members and the Créche Master. However, the base had not been told to Anakin when he’d been put on the council on Palpatine's order, simply because everyone had more important things on their minds. He’s incredibly thankful that was the case. 

As he gets closer to The Temple, it becomes clear that someone was definitely left behind in the evacuation. Though partially concealed, the Force signature is familiar; bright and young, radiating fear and loneliness. Obi-Wan has no doubt it’s a youngling. Despite the grief coursing through him, the tear stains on his cheeks, his nose being blocked with snot, he shifts the controls of his starship to make a landing in the hangar; he cannot leave the child behind unprotected and vulnerable. 

He also realises that since Anakin’s plan was to fake the death of the Jedi, that if Sidious discovered that one was still alive, even if they were a youngling, it could put Anakin in danger. Despite Obi-Wan’s current feelings about Anakin and the events of the last few hours, he could never put Anakin in danger by doing or neglecting to do something. He loved Anakin far too much. 

Exiting the ship, he finds the hangar abandoned; ships are left untouched, cargo partially unpacked, the occasional stray clone helmet left behind in the rush of the evacuation. Most of the ships were still in the hangar, and Obi-Wan silently praises whoever conducted the evacuation. Whoever did so was trying to protect Anakin by abiding by Anakin’s plan – faking the slaughter of the Jedi, not simply evacuating them – by leaving the ships behind and Obi-Wan has to assume, taking the underground tunnels to the bunker it abided by the allusion that Anakin had done the deed he’d been ordered, and he and his clones had transported their bodies to Mustafar. Obi-Wan was confident it was Rex; Rex had unmatched loyalty to his General and would do everything he possibly could to protect his life. Obi-Wan feels an immense amount of gratitude for the Captain. 

Obi-Wan leaves the hangar, searching within the Force to find the child; they’re no longer attempting to hide their signature, undoubtedly being able to sense Obi-Wan’s presence and recognising him within the Force as a fellow Jedi. He makes his way along the corridors quickly, knowing it’s not safe for him to be here even though it seems he was the only Jedi that Darth Sidious granted Anakin to spare. The Temple is eerily quiet, silent except for the sound of his boots on the floor, and then, a quiet clattering from a storage cupboard up ahead, and he hurries toward it, seeing the door opening a small crack once he gets close. 

“Hello,” he says softly, “It’s Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. I’m here to help you,” sure enough, a little green ear, followed by a head, peeks out from behind the steel door. Obi-wan smiles softly in relief at his discovery; he was one of the most promising younglings after all, “Hello, Grogu,” he greets, and the creature slips out from the storage cupboard and waddles to him. Obi-Wan picks him up and holds him in the crook of his arm, the child, though the same age as Anakin, was considered a baby in his species and was too young to speak and was only just learning to communicate through the Force, so Obi-Wan isn’t able to find out how he was left behind, but it doesn’t matter now. Obi-Wan has him; he's safe.

Obi-Wan rushes back to the hanger, and after a moment of thought, abandons his starship and climbs into a small speeder instead, sitting Grogu in his lap as he turns it on. Speeders of this type didn’t have tracking and navigation systems in them, meaning he couldn’t be tracked by Anakin, and though Obi-Wan’s ship wouldn’t have looked out of place in Coruscant traffic, a speeder would go even more unnoticed. Obi-Wan needed to get to the base as soon as possible; he knew Anakin, the man would have people looking for him by now. The base had been constructed with the ability to hide Force sensitives' signatures from detection outside of the base. Obi-Wan didn't quite understand how it was done, given it was developed hundreds of years ago, but he knew it worked as the only Force sensitive he could detect when he reached out in the Force was Grogu.

Grogu’s claw-like hand is curled into Obi-Wan’s robes, his little head resting against his stomach; fear and confusion radiating from the small creature. Obi-Wan rests a hand on the tiny thing's head, brushing fingers across the fine white hairs to soothe him, quickly realising it’s what he does to Anakin, and almost stopping before Grogu makes a noise of contentment and curls against him more, so Obi-Wan swallows the lump in his throat and continues. He’d always been fascinated by Yoda’s species, the Master being over eight-hundred years old with potentially two hundred more to live, and Grogu was twenty-two years old but still a baby. Obi-Wan took any opportunity he could to get out some information from Master Yoda about his secret species. 

Half an hour later, Obi-Wan had flown to the other side of Coruscant and arrived at the location of the base, hiding the speeder and tucking a sleeping Grogu into his robes before entering one of the abandoned factories. The large door closes behind him as he’s met with two clone troopers pointing blasters at him before they recognise him and express their relief for his safe return, using their comms to announce it to the others. Obi-Wan thanks them, tells them the speeder's location, and follows directions to the hidden elevator that would take him hundreds of metres underground.

* * *

The base's sleeping quarters are on the very bottom level, under the small hangar, to give the best chance of a successful evacuation if the base was ever found. The hangar only held a few starships and speeders, not enough for everyone, and followed a straight tunnel that eventually popped out the side of a mountain in the forest. The sleeping quarters were cramped and depressing, merely one large room filled with rows and rows of three-mattress bunk beds, except for the far corner, which held several cribs. 

Obi-Wan’s bed was almost dead in the middle of the large room, and it was overwhelming to be in a space too small for so many people, all their Force signatures blurring together. Obi-Wan is on a top bunk, so he stares up at the concrete ceiling mere feet away from his face, tracing the cracks in it with his eyes, feeling his chest rise and fall with each breath beneath his hands. He’s exhausted, his eyelids heavy and his limbs sore, but he’d been resisting sleep, not wanting to see what he knows would appear behind his eyes once he fell into unconsciousness. 

He lays there for hours, listening to the sounds of his fellow Jedi’s snores and the occasional sleep talk until his tired mind finally gives in to the pull of sleep, and he drifts into unconsciousness. He dreams of Anakin when he was young, back when Obi-Wan was first teaching him to use a lightsaber and the young boy accidentally let his training saber slip from his hand after a swing and it had flown across the room, and Anakin had giggled to cover up his embarrassment, but his pink cheeks had given it away. Life was much more peaceful back when Anakin was still a child.


	2. Chapter 2

“Now, now, my dear boy,” Sidious says, hand cupping Anakin’s lower back, almost the curve of his backside, and leads him from the hangar. Anakin can hear his Lieutenant barking orders at the rest of the Clones, “Kenobi will come around. I will deploy my best people to begin tracking him first thing in the morning.”

Anakin nods, barely listening, but aware of the fragility of their new dynamic, how easily Sidious could simply take back his promise now that Anakin had nowhere to go anyway, quickly replies, “Thank you, Master.”

It’s the middle of the night, the earliest hours of the morning. Coruscant is bathed in darkness, the traffic has slowed; the city is quiet; it only made sense if the news of the Jedi’s evacuation and Sidious’ beginning of becoming Emperor hadn’t gone public yet. Sidious proceeds to confirm his thoughts as the walk through the halls of the Palace, “You must be exhausted after all you have done for me tonight, Darth Vader,” he says, and Anakin resists the urge to flinch at his new name, “I have quarters for you here until we can arrange your own personal building. You’re free to rest, I will not be needing your assistance tomorrow, it will be a mess of politics, that’s all.”

They step into an elevator, and Sidious’ wrinkled finger selects the 12th floor. Anakin had been to the Palace a few times before, when Sidious had wanted to see him outside the business hours of the Senate Building, or he wanted more privacy. He had basic knowledge of the building’s layout, but after discovering that Sidious was the Sith Lord, he knew he had absolutely no understanding of what truly lied within the Palace walls.

“Thank you, Master,” Anakin repeats, unable to form any other words as he realises Sidious was right; he was absolutely exhausted, his eyelids were almost impossibly heavy to keep open, his legs were weak and his hands shook where they peaked out from his too-long robes. His lightsaber burned against his hip, knowing the dark deeds he’d just committed with it against the Separatist leaders.

The elevator dings and they step out. He’s led down another hall until they come to a blast door, Sidious punches in a code as he repeats it out loud and then ushers Anakin inside. His eyes widen slightly at the appearance of the room; it’s larger than his and Obi-Wan’s quarters back at the Temple, but the kitchenette is much smaller; a refrigerator and microwave with a small amount of counter space. The floor is dark marble, and the walls are patterned red wallpaper. It’s all one room.

“Rest, my young apprentice,” Sidious says as Anakin looks around the room, the weight of his hand leaving his back and instead clasping his shoulder and squeezing, Anakin tenses as he resists recoiling away from the touch, but Sidious moves away quickly, starting for the door out of his new quarters, “Oh,” he begins, turning again, “You are not to be seen publicly tomorrow. You are Darth Vader now, Anakin Skywalker died with the rest of the Jedi. Your old identity is to continue being unknown to the public; the results of them being aware of your history with the Jedi are unpredictable.”

Anakin nods, wondering if he should bow to the old man, “Yes, Master. Whatever you wish.”

Sidious smiles, his melted, wrinkled face contorting disturbingly; it’s almost difficult to look at, “Good, Vader. Now rest.”

Anakin nods, and Sidious disappears from the room, the door sliding closed behind him as Anakin lets out a deep breath. He’s quick to shed his robes, dropping them to the cold floor as he spots a door just a few metres to the side of the incredibly inviting bed. He finds a small fresher and is quick to climb into the sonic, relishing the feeling of sweat and traces of black Mustafar sand being lifted from his body.

He’s done within minutes, not bothering to redress or brush his teeth, he makes his way to the large bed, pulling back the dark, silk duvet and climbing under it. He falls into a restless sleep within seconds.

* * *

Obi-Wan didn’t feel as if he belonged in the base with the other Jedi. It wasn’t as if he was being pushed away by the rest of the Jedi, the only one who’d given him the side-eye had been Windu, but Obi-Wan wasn’t too offended given the man was ‘crabby’ as one of the younglings had said since losing his arm; especially since the base didn’t have the facilities to provide him with a prosthetic.

The feeling of not belonging was that he didn’t deserve to be in the base; he was the reason for Anakin’s fall, and therefore, Sidious’ rise. Obi-Wan had allowed himself to indulge in Anakin and their relationship; Obi-Wan was a Jedi Master, more at-one with the Force than Anakin, more disciplined, his emotions more controlled, yet he had given into temptations; lust for Anakin’s body, and a craving for his love. Now, the consequences of their attachment to one another are known; he would turn to the dark side to save Obi-Wan from what he had described from his dreams to be a ‘painful and brutal death’. While Jedi were often taught that to become one with the Force was an honour, Obi-Wan would not be so ignorant to admit he didn’t care if he lived or died, because he did care; he wanted to live. He wanted to see the end of the Clone Wars, a galaxy at peace, to see the Jedi Order change for the better, and most of all, he had wanted a future with Anakin. However, despite his desire to live, he would never wish to be saved by the dark side.

It had been two weeks now since it was discovered Chancellor Palpatine was the Sith Lord, and just days after he had essentially overthrown the Senate publicly announced the Republic’s turn to the Empire, and he, its Emperor. It had been general chaos ever since as his troopers enforced new laws and he attempted to silence the public’s outcry against the ‘slaughter’ of the Jedi and Sidious’ new rule; the entire galaxy seemed to understand Sidious would bring devastation.

A week after the first broadcast, Obi-Wan’s face along with the other Jedi who had not been at the Temple, had been plastered over the holonet with a statement that announced they were wanted by the Empire, and that those with information would be arrested and punished if they were found to be concealing it. It was also suspected there had been bounties put on their heads. Plo Koon and Aayla Secura had been in contact and had managed to meet up and would be arriving at the base as soon as they could, but Ki-Adi-Mundi had been found and captured; it had not been revealed whether he was killed or not. They hadn’t heard from anyone else. Obi-Wan knew that if he was captured, he wouldn’t be killed, after all, his survival was Anakin’s reward for pledging himself to Darth Sidious. It made him feel sick.

Anakin’s first public appearance as Darth Vader had been only a few days ago. Sidious sat in the throne with Anakin stood beside him, dressed in long black robes, a metal plate over his chest and a helmet that completely covered his face. Sidious had introduced him as his apprentice who would be acting alongside him in enforcing new policies within the galaxy and was leading the search for the remaining Jedi. There had been no mention of Anakin’s former identity, or past as a Jedi, so it could be assumed that Sidious had decided, or Anakin had requested, that his identity remained a secret.

It was without doubt that it was Anakin beneath those robes; the whole base had gone silent, as it always did whenever there was a broadcast, but all eyes had eventually turned to look at Obi-Wan with pity. It was the first time Obi-Wan had seen Anakin since Mustafar, and to see his partner like that, hidden and at the side of a Sith, had crushed Obi-Wan. All he’d wanted to do was lower his shields and reach out to Anakin; to ask if he was okay, if Sidious had hurt him. He couldn’t though; reaching out to Anakin would risk letting the location of the base slip.

Obi-Wan had risen where he sat with Cody, Yoda and Mace, and left the Cafeteria. The gaze of the Order had been on him, they could all sense the chaos of his Force signature, as he was too distracted to bother hiding it.

There was a small meditative area in the base and Obi-Wan made his way there, locking the blaster door behind him. It was a terrible place to mediate, hundreds of metres underground, all concrete walls and floor. The meditative mats were old and pulled from storage, too firm to be comfortable. There were no windows, and really only the Masters and more advanced Knights were able to properly connect to the force and mediate. The training of the younglings had been put on hold and Yoda was doing a terrible job of concealing that he was concerned about the halt in their development, that it would delay their ability to become Padawans. Padawans were still being taught by Masters, but not properly; with no missions or proper connection to the Force, they weren’t able to do much more than spar or have lessons up in the hangars. Obi-Wan couldn’t bring himself to care too much, which he knew was awful, he should be doing his part to help, assist in training the younglings at the very least, but it really, all he did was mope around and wait for the next broadcast, hoping to see a glimpse of Anakin, or even Padmé or Bail.

Obi-Wan sits down on a mat, crossing his knees, but he doesn’t attempt to mediate. He simply sits and ponders the thought that by staying at the base he endangered everyone. He knew Anakin would searching for him, relentlessly, for Obi-Wan knew how much Anakin loved him, he had been able to feel it through their bond, and in the past weeks, Anakin had proved what he was willing to do to protect Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan knew he should go far from the base to protect the Order. Anakin wouldn’t be able to fake the slaughter of the Jedi a second time if Sidious were to discover they were in fact alive and knew their location. Obi-Wan could only imagine the devastation in the Force, how empty it would feel if the Order was abolished, much as it did now with their signatures concealed, except there would be no hope for their return.

* * *

Anakin wakes to a persistent knocking on his door. It echoes around the chambers, bouncing off the walls and disturbing the first peaceful sleep he’d managed to fall into. He hadn’t slept well since Mustafar at all, he was too on edge to fall asleep most of the time, but whenever he did, he was often plagued by the same visions of Obi-Wan’s death. It was exhausting, he was running on fumes and caff. 

He groans as he sits up and the silk duvet pools around his hips. He shouts to whoever’s behind his door that he’s coming, and rises from the bed, pulling on a robe to cover his naked body before pulling the door open. Face twisted with annoyance, he’s met by a clone from his platoon, and Anakin’s reminded how much he hates that Sidious’ clones don’t use names because he couldn’t recite the designation of the clone in front of him if his life depended on it.

“It’s the middle of the night,” Anakin hisses, rubbing at his eyes and resisting the urge to yawn.

“Sir,” the trooper starts, saluting him, “General Kenobi has been located and captured by the Lieutenant. He’s being placed in the cells as we speak.”

Anakin balks for a second, then steps back into his quarters, gripping the trooper’s wrist to bring him with him, “Is he alright?” he asks as he drops his robe and pulls clothes from his closet to change into, almost falling on his face in his franticness as he pulled his pants up his leg.

“He appears to be, sir. There was an altercation with the troopers who apprehended him, but I’ve been told he only has minor injuries,” he replies, and he sounds nervous; clearly remembering Anakin’s order from Mustafar that Obi-Wan wasn’t to be harmed under any circumstances.

“Where was he found? Was he alone?” Anakin asks from where he sits on the edge of his bed, pulling his boots on, quickly lacing him. He doesn’t bother with the full uniform and armour that Sidious had arranged for him; it was the middle of the night and he wouldn’t be seen publicly after all. The trooper is stood off to the side, fidgeting awkwardly, and Anakin realises he’d probably been taught it was inappropriate for him to be in Anakin’s private quarters.

“On the lower levels. He was meeting with Senator Organa, who’s also been arrested for resisting the General’s capture. We believe it was just the two of them. The Lieutenant is with the Senator now if you wanted a report.”

After collecting his lightsaber and attaching it to his belt, Anakin and the trooper leave his quarters and step into the elevator, the trooper selecting the basement level. Anakin realises that he’d never been in the basement level of the Palace before, nor had really paid much attention to the fact that there was one; however, he finds it completely unsurprising that there would be cells down there, and he wonders who Sidious had down there, even before he became Emperor.

The elevator dings after a few moments, and they step out, only to step into another a few moments later, except this elevator only has five level options; basement, down to negative four. The trooper presses the lowest level and they're off again.

Exiting the second elevator, they’re met with a large blast door guarded by two suited guards, both holding blasters across their chests. Anakin frowns when they don’t move to let them through, and the trooper clears his throat and leans closer to Anakin, “They can’t just let us through, they have to be ordered by certain authorities, which you fall under, sir,” he tells him quietly, still fidgeting and Anakin can tell by his face and behaviour that he’s a shiny. Anakin wants to know his name.

“Let us pass immediately,” Anakin commands. The guards step to the side, the one on the left typing a code into the keypad beside the blaster door, and it hisses and slides open seconds later.

Anakin and the trooper step through into a large open space. On both the left and right there’s blast doors along the length of the space, a guard stationed at each one, a total of twenty guards. The blast doors have a label above them, and Anakin reads the closest one; zero to fifteen. He’s horrified when he realises that equates to three-hundred cells; it’s not just a few cells, it’s a small prison. It has to be something Sidious did secretly, there was no way a Chancellor would have been permitted to have a private prison in the Palace.

He’s snapped out of his shock by the trooper speaking and beginning to walk forward, “I was told he’d be in one-five-two.”

Anakin jogs ahead until he finds the blast door with the label the number fits under and commands the guard to open the door and then charges through it. He skids to a stop when he reaches Obi-Wan’s cell, looking through what must be one-way glass given Obi-Wan is facing him but seemingly having no reaction to his presence. Anakin lets out a breath at the sight of the older man, taking in his dishevelled appearance and the blood smeared down his cheek. He looks exhausted, eyes heavy as he stares ahead, waiting. Obi-Wan’s robes have been removed, leaving him in pants and an undertunic that reveals the Force Suppression Collar around his neck. Anakin almost shudders at the sight of it; he’d worn one a few times when missions had gone wrong and he’d been taken prisoner for a period of time, and he remembers how horrible it was. He can only imagine how it would feel for someone like Obi-Wan, who was as strongly connected to the Force as he was.

Anakin swallows thickly, “Go find me a medpac,” he tells the trooper, and hears his footsteps making their way down the hall seconds later. Anakin pushes the button that opens the blast door.

Obi-Wan’s head snaps to look at him as he steps inside, “Anakin,” he says breathily, standing from the metal bench he sat on as his face twists in anger, “Or do I have to call you Lord Vader now?” he asks, and he sounds pained at the question.

Anakin shakes his head and the blast door hisses closed behind him, “No. You can call me Anakin,” he murmurs, “Please,” he adds a second later. Obi-Wan stares at him, fists clenching and Anakin steps forward when he realises he’s cuffed, but Obi-Wan takes a step back in response, “Let me take them off.”

Obi-Wan looks down at his hands, like he’d forgotten the cuffs were there, and doesn’t move away again when Anakin steps closer to inspect them, gently holding Obi-Wan’s wrists and savouring the warmth of his skin. The cuffs are the same kind as those used in the Galactic prisons, unlockable by a scanner that he definitely doesn’t have on him, but the guards should.

“They need a scanner. One of my troopers just went to get a medpac, I’ll have him get the scanner when he comes back,” he tells the older man, disappointed that he wasn’t able to relieve his discomfort straight away.

Obi-Wan nods and quickly moves away from him; Anakin’s hands hang at his side in defeat.

“What will be done to Senator Organa?”

“I don’t know. Master might want to punish him since concealing information about the remaining Jedi is illegal. I don’t know if he’s been moved into a cell yet, or if he’s already been taken for questioning,” Anakin replies, eyes fixated on the flickering of the cell light before he hears Obi-Wan suck in a deep breath. Looking at the Jedi, he’s a taken back by how suddenly enraged he looks, “Obi-Wan-“

“Don’t you fucking dare call him Master in front of me,” he hisses, his voice so frightening and commanding that Anakin drops his head as his hands begin to shake. Obi-Wan rarely swore outside of their intimate activities, so it always put Anakin on edge to hear him curse in other situations, it usually meant he was absolutely livid.

“I’m sorry, Obi-Wan,” He responds, his voice barely a whisper. He sounds like a frightened Padawan again about to get a scolding for going against Obi-Wan’s orders, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Obi-Wan snorts sardonically, “How could I possibly not be upset right now?” he snarls, “I’ve been imprisoned at my former Padawan’s order.”

“I’m still you’re Padawan, Master, I always will be,” Anakin says weakly, “That’s what you’ve always told me.”

“That was until you took a new Master,” Obi-Wan barks.

“Obi-Wan, I told you I had no choice.”

“Oh do not start this again!”

Before they can repeat the argument they’d had on Mustafar, the blast door hisses open and Anakin’s trooper appears. He looks nervous as always, probably having been watching them argue through the window, “Uh, your medpac, sir,” he says and awkwardly holds it out, eyes flickering between the two of them.

“Thank you,” Anakin says and takes it, “Now, please go get a scanner of one of the guards so I can release his cuffs.”

“They may not be permitted to do that, sir.”

“Tell them I ordered it. If they still won’t hand it over bring them to me.”

“Yes, sir,” he replies, and then hurries down the hall after closing the blast door.

“He’s fresh,” Obi-Wan says softly as the door closes, his anger from moments ago appearing to have dissipated.

Anakin nods and moves to sit on the metal bench, motioning for Obi-Wan to join him as he opens the medpac. He hesitates for a few moments but eventually sits down, a foot of space between them.

“Does it hurt?” Anakin asks as he gently wipes away at the blood on his face, quickly finding the source to be a cut along his forehead.

“I’ve had much worse.”

“That doesn’t mean lesser things don’t hurt,” Anakin huffs, putting down the soiled cloth and grabbing another, “I want you checked out by a healer in the morning.”

“I’m your prisoner, you can do what you wish with me,” Obi-Wan sighs, finally moving his eyes to look into Anakin’s own instead of the wall behind him.

Anakin goes to argue, but he knows it’s technically true. He had captured Obi-Wan against his will, despite his good intentions, so he was to some degree, holding Obi-Wan captive.

“You won’t be like a prisoner here, Obi-Wan,” he replies, deciding to not deny what he had said, “You won’t be kept down here. You’ll have your own quarters if you don’t want to be in mine. You’ll be able to move around the Palace as you wish soon, just with a guard until I know you won’t try to escape; I don’t think you could anyway, there’s that much security in this place.”

Obi-Wan sighs heavily and surprisingly, doesn’t object, “I’m the only exception of the Jedi, aren’t I? He’ll order the death of any others found.”

“I pledged myself to Sidious in return for your survival, so it’s a given that no harm is to come to you,” Anakin replies, and catches himself before reminding Obi-Wan that it was him who allowed the Jedi to evacuate. He wouldn’t be surprised to know there was cameras or audio devices at the very least inside of the cells, “Master Ki-Adi-Mundi is still alive. He’s being questioned for the locations of the other Jedi.”

Obi-Wan seems genuinely surprised at that but recovers quickly, “Questioned using what methods?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t been involved with him since his capture,” Anakin replies, dropping the second soiled cloth now that Obi-Wan’s face is clean of blood, the large gash on his forehead now completely visible. He collects an alcoholic wipe next, meeting Obi-Wan’s eyes again, “This will sting,” he warns, continuing when Obi-Wan nods, but still feeling a pang of guilt when Obi-Wan winces at the sensation of the alcohol on the gash, “I’m sorry.”

Obi-Wan sighs relieved once Anakin puts a patch on the gash and closes the medpac, “Thank you.”

Anakin smiles softly, starting to relax now that Obi-Wan seemed to have forgotten his anger, “Of course. It’s my job to take care of you.” he tells him, and then freezes in surprise when Obi-Wan leans forward and drops his head onto Anakin’s shoulder, his cuffed hands moving to rest in Anakin’s lap instead of his own, “Master?”

“I’ve missed you, Anakin,” Obi-Wan murmurs, his voice muffled by the material of Anakin’s robe, “It has been a very difficult month without you.”

Anakin hesitates for a moment, but places his hands on Obi-Wan’s back, “We’ve been apart much longer than a month before.”

“This is very different, and you know it,” Obi-Wan replies, almost nuzzling against Anakin’s neck.

Anakin sighs and kisses the top of his Master’s head, “Yeah, I do know. I’m sorry, Obi-Wan. I love you so much. It’s been unbearable.”

Obi-Wan sighs, almost contently, and then pulls back, looking at him with watery blue eyes. He simply looks at him, and Anakin can’t think of anything to say, so they fall into silence, with Anakin gently brushing his thumb over Obi-Wan’s wrist, and the older man looking more and more tired with each moment that passed.

They were both so entranced with being in one another’s presence that they didn’t realise the trooper had arrived again until he cleared his throat loudly. They both snap out of it, and Anakin accepts the scanner that he holds out to him, using it to unlock Obi-Wan’s cuffs, passing them to the trooper too as the Jedi rubbed at the red marks on his skin.

“There guards made it clear sir that they’d like us to leave. We’re breaking protocol by being here at this hour, they said. Lord Sidious may punish them for it,” the trooper says. Whatever training and conditioning Sidious’ clones had that made them more ruthless and much less prone to emotion and personality than those who fought in the War, clearly had not had its proper effect on this clone, for he, not in so many words, had just asked Anakin to leave so that his fellow Clones wouldn’t face punishment. Anakin was glad for it, it reminded him of Rex, Jesse, Fox or Kix. He missed them; he hoped they were safe.

Anakin decides to respect the trooper’s wishes, and stands, “You’ll have to stay in here tonight, but I’ll talk with Sidious in the morning,” Anakin tells Obi-Wan, and he nods as his face twitches like he’s resisting a yawn.

When Anakin leans down and presses his lips against the top of Obi-Wan’s head, the older man doesn’t protest. To step out of the cell and then lock Obi-Wan back inside feels incredibly wrong, his stomach almost churning.

He stays for a few moments, watching Obi-Wan through the one-way window. He watches as he rubs his hands over his face, wincing when he accidently touches the patch. Once Obi-Wan stands and moves to the small steel toilet in the corner of the cell is when Anakin truly leaves, knowing it was wrong to watch Obi-Wan in a private moment without his permission.

When the reach the end of the corridor Anakin approaches the guard to Obi-Wan’s corridor and holds out the cuffs that he’d taken back from the trooper, “Thank you for your patience,” he says and it unintentionally comes off more sarcastic than genuine. The guard takes them without a word.

The trooper accompanies Anakin back to his quarters, stating that it was just precaution in case anyone had followed Obi-Wan to the Palace. Anakin didn’t argue.

The door to Anakin’s quarters is open and the trooper is halfway back to the elevator when Anakin turned spun back around, “Hey,” he called, and the trooper immediately stopped and turned to face him again.

“Yes, sir?”

“What’s your name?” Anakin asks, “Not your designation number, your name. I know you gave yourself one, that you probably all have. If you fear you’ll be punished by me for using them, you won’t be. If Sidious has a problem with it, I’ll deal with it. Please, tell me your name?”

He balks for a few seconds, mouth opening and closing before he clears his throat, “Axel, sir,” he finally mutters, unable to meet Anakin’s gaze, instead staring down at his boots.

“Axel,” Anakin repeats, a smile spreading across his lips, and knowing that he shared quarters with the rest of Anakin’s Platoon says, “Let the rest of the boys know I’d like to know their names too, if they’re comfortable sharing. Goodnight, Axel.”

It’s small, and Anakin almost misses it, but a smile comes over Axel’s face before he nods and then proceeds to hurry back toward the elevator. Anakin grins to himself as he enters his quarters and begins shedding his clothes, eventually collapsing into his bed, relieved to know where Obi-Wan is.

* * *

Anakin politely accepts the cup of tea the servant hands to him despite his dislike for the stuff, always having much preferred caff. The only time he ever drank tea was to please Obi-Wan or on missions when it was a common social construct and was rude to refuse it. He even used to turn it down from Sidious when he’d visit him in the Palace or his office at the Senate Building, but since becoming aware of what the older man was, and pledging himself to him, Anakin felt as if he had to walk on eggshells around him. He was terrified of doing something wrong that would make Sidious go back on his word of saving Obi-Wan.

“It was very good news to wake up to that Obi-Wan had been found,” Sidious says, leaning back in his plush chair and sipping at his tea, “I assume you saw him last night?” 

“Yes, Master. I was with him for a little while before I decided it was best he got some rest. There was a minor altercation during his capture,” Anakin tells him, resisting the urge to cringe as he swallowed down a mouthful of tea. It was much stronger than Obi-Wan ever made it for him.

“I was surprised that you didn’t take him back to your quarters,” Sidious replied, watching him carefully, the skin above his eyes so melted it almost droops down over them. He suddenly reminds Anakin of the character in a horror film Ahsoka had made him watch with her in the theatre years ago.

“I want him out of the cells, but I don’t think he’d want to share my quarters yet, Master,” Anakin replies, his tongue itching with the urge to ask why Sidious had a small prison under the palace, and why so many cells were full. Who were they? Did people know that’s where they were? Were they just listed somewhere as missing persons?

Sidious hums, ignorant to Anakin’s curiosities, not seeming bothered at all that Anakin had discovered his prison. Anakin reminds himself that he’s a Sith apprentice, of course Sidious wouldn’t be bothered, Anakin was supposed to be okay with corrupt things like a secret prison.

“He’s still being difficult then?” Sidious asks.

“He needs more time,” Anakin replies, reminding himself to keep gradually working at his tea. He guesses that at least half of the cup would be an acceptable amount to drink before leaving it, “He can’t forgive me yet.” It’s painful to say, but he knows it’s the truth. The brief affection he’d gotten from Obi-Wan hours ago would not be a constant thing; the man was still undeniably furious but had had a moment of weakness probably caused by relief of seeing Anakin again.

“Very well then. Somewhere with more security than your quarters wouldn’t do any harm either. I’ll see to it.” Sidious drawls, “I’ll have him moved from the cells by the end of the day. I’d like to speak with him first, see if I can gather any information about Plo Koon and Aayla Secura. They still remain significant threats.”

Anakin’s hand freezes where he was bringing the teacup to his mouth, dread suddenly pooling in his stomach, “Master-“

“Oh, don’t fret, dear boy,” Sidious laughs, “I won’t use the same methods as those being used on Ki-Adi-Mundi. We’ll simply have a chat.”

Anakin nods, but feels no less at ease, “Okay,” he murmurs, “I’d like him to be checked over by a healer too.”

Sidious sighs but nods, then stands, “Now,” he says, encouraging Anakin to stand as well, “Off you go, I’d like to read a full report of his apprehension. Go chase one up with your lieutenant,” he orders, ushering Anakin out the door and then closing it behind him.

Anakin sighs, swallows down the lump in his throat and takes a second to straighten his robes before making his way the elevator by Sidious’ private office. The clone’s accommodations are on the other side of the Palace, one of the many towers, and it’s quite a trip of different halls and elevators to get there. Once in the first elevator, he leans against the mirrored wall, sighing loudly and scratching at his scalp. He just wants his Obi-Wan back, the one who loves him, who kisses him and praises him; who gave him everything he could ever need from a relationship. He hated being frozen out; he hoped that he could get Obi-Wan to realise he was doing everything for his safety, that he would understand and be with Anakin again, properly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love axel, okay?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiya, welcome to chap 3
> 
> WARNING!!!  
> A sex scene that includes consensual, but under-discussed light choking.

Darth Sidious’ words ring loud in Obi-Wan’s head as he’s guided along the endless halls of the palace. The scent of bacta is strong in his nose where the healer had slathered it over the wound on his forehead:

_“Darth Vader becoming my apprentice has been in the works since he was a child, when I first sensed how strong in the force he was; the potential we would have together. I planted the seed and after growing for a decade, it has finally flourished. I will not allow you to destroy it.”_

The words had been paired with the old Sith’s hand tight around his upper arm, sending weak jolts of force lighting up his limb in a silent promise, and Obi-Wan, despite his usual behaviour of smart-mouthing to irritate his opponent and or enemy, he’d bit his tongue. His life was in Sidious’ hands, not Anakin’s. At any time, the Sith Lord could go against the promise he’d made to Anakin and kill Obi-Wan to save himself the trouble of holding him prisoner. It wouldn’t be difficult to find another way to keep Anakin at his side.

Sidious hadn’t stayed with him long, just long enough question him as to the location of the remaining Jedi, which he honestly knew nothing about as they hadn’t heard from Plo Koon and Aayla Secura in weeks, and to deliver his threat if Obi-Wan were to become a threat to his hold over Anakin. Afterward, Obi-Wan was guided to the healers’ wing of the Palace where the wound on his head that Anakin had tended to last night, was seen to with a bit more finesse, as well as being given a complete check over and a small tube of bacta to take with him.

Now, he was being led by two armed guards to what he assumed would be his new chamber. From what Anakin had told him, he would no longer be kept in a cell, but he doubted he would be receiving much luxury. The guards were silent as they guided him through the endless halls, unwilling to engage with the few questions he’d asked them, so he focused on his surroundings instead, remembering everything that he could.

Under different circumstances, he would have enjoyed being inside of the famous palace, it was undoubtedly a gorgeous place, and he could have spent hours exploring it and discovering its secrets if he wasn’t currently being held prisoner. After exiting a third elevator, one of the guards directs him to stop while the other continues down the short hall to the single blast door; he swipes a key card and the door hisses open, the guard stepping inside for a few moments before returning, and Obi-Wan rolls his eyes at the precaution. Obi-Wan’s then led through the door and one of the guards unlocks his cuffs before exiting, the door sliding closed behind him.

The room is nicer than he had expected it to be, with cream-coloured plaster hides steel walls, and the floor is a similar shade of marble. A small, but inviting bed sits in the corner pressed against the wall, perfectly made up with white covers. There’s a couch facing the wall where a holoprojector was hung, and Obi-Wan assumes that Sidious would have had altered to only give him access to specific channels, avoiding ones such as holonet broadcasts. There wasn’t any form of a kitchenette, only a small table to eat at with a stack of plastic cups on top of it, so his meals must be delivered. Finally, a door within the room led to a small ‘fresher, and he’s relieved to find it was a water-operated shower and not just a sonic. He’d always preferred the feeling of a shower’s hot water as opposed to sonics, but the base was only equipped with sonics, so he hadn’t felt the warmth of a shower on his skin since before he’d left to fight General Grievous.

He finds that the small closet beside the door to the ‘fresher contains several pairs of loose beige pants and white tunics, and the accompanying drawers container matching white socks and underwear. He grabs one of each item of clothing and enters the ‘fresher. He tosses his dirty clothes into the small hamper beside the sink then steps under the hot water of the shower, groaning as it falls over his aching muscles. He savours the shower, scrubbing at his skin with faint flowery scented soap and removing the blood and grease from his hair with a similar shampoo that drips down his face and stings the wound on his head. Once he’s clean and warm, he shuts off the water and begins to dry himself.

He can’t examine the wound on his head because the bathroom lacks a mirror, for what he assumes is safety reasons in the event that he would smash it and use the glass on himself, or anyone else who entered the chamber. He applies some more bacta to the wound as best he can without seeing it, then brushes his teeth before redressing.

He tugs at the collar around his neck, but finds it has no give. He hates the thing. To be cut off from the force completely was awful and he didn’t know how he would cope if he was subjected to it for an extended period of time. It had been hell the previous night; he’d been unable to release his emotions that had arisen due to seeing Anakin again into the force and couldn’t meditate. However, it prevented him from having to constantly shield his and Anakin’s force bond.

When he exits the ‘fresher, he, to his own embarrassment, jumps in surprise when he finds Anakin sitting on the couch.

“Obi-Wan, hi.”

Obi-Wan swallows thickly, straightening out his wrinkled tunic, “Hello, Anakin.”

“Did Sidious’ hurt you?” Anakin asks quickly, fingers clenching the fabric of his pants, “He told me he only wanted to talk to you but…”

“No, we merely had a discussion,” Obi-Wan lies while his arm still tingles from the electric jolts Sidious had sent up it. He opts to distance himself from the young man and sits down at one of the dining chairs instead of joining him on the couch.

Anakin nods, satisfied, shifting uncomfortably, “Good. I mean, he shouldn’t hurt you, it was a part of our agreement,” he quickly adds.

“An agreement that I would not be surprise to discover he had gone against,” Obi-Wan replies, and Anakin opens his mouth to argue but quickly closes it, running his hands up and down his thighs nervously, “By that reaction you agree.”

“No. He’ll teach me how to save you, he promised,” Anakin replies, but to Obi-Wan it sounds more like he’s trying to convince himself. He then clears his throat and gestures around the room, “Is it okay?” he asks.

“It’s fine,” Obi-Wan answers.

“It can only be unlocked with a key card, but here,” Anakin begins, pulling out a comm from his robes and using the force to float it over to Obi-Wan, something, at another time, Obi-Wan would have lectured him for, “You can reach me, my troops, the kitchens, maids and the healing quarters from that. You’ll get food delivered three times a day and a maid once a week anyway, but if in between there’s something you need, you just let them or me know. There’s no cameras or anything inside here either, so you have privacy.”

Obi-Wan stares down at the comm and it almost feels as if the force within him, beneath his skin, is vibrating with anger. He looks up and meets Anakin’s gaze, and asks gently, “Anakin, are you aware that you’re holding me captive?”

Anakin’s head drops to look down to face his lap and Obi-Wan can see the younger man’s hands begin to tremble in his lap. He knows that his eyes would be wet with unushered tears, “Master,” he finally whispers, and Obi-Wan’s chest pangs at the term. Anakin hadn’t officially been his Padawan for almost three years, but Obi-Wan never stopped referring to him as his Padawan and Anakin had never stopped calling him Master, even when they were alone, he still called Obi-Wan Master more often than he did his real name. To hear Anakin address him as Master, while he’s pledged an apprentice to someone else, hurts Obi-Wan so deeply, in a way that he couldn’t explain without admitting to numerous breechings of the code.

“This isn’t right, Anakin,” Obi-Wan finally sighs, sighing loudly and trying to release the anger he feels. The last thing he needs is to give into feelings such as that right now.

“I know, Master,” Anakin whines, still not daring to look at him, “I just wish you would understand. That you would listen to me. I didn’t want to turn to Sidious, but I had to,” he tells him, sniffling and wiping at his eyes.

Obi-Wan shakes his head, tugging at his wet hair momentarily, “Anakin, I can’t just forgive this.”

“I know,” Anakin replied, his voice a whimpered whisper, like a child who was being punished.

Seeing Anakin upset stirred an urge in him that he had never been able to ignore; to comfort and nurture the damaged young man, provide him with the affection and reassurance he always so desperately needed. Obi-Wan had never been strong enough, able to follow the code close enough to deny Anakin anything, and now, despite what the man had done, it hadn’t changed.

Obi-Wan contemplates for a moment and then stands, moving to sit down beside the young Sith apprentice and taking his organic hand, now also covered by a thick leather glove, black to match the rest of his attire, but he must have left the helmet elsewhere as he wasn’t wearing it when he’d entered. Anakin looks up at him, blue eyes red-rimmed and glassy, and after a moment, he scootches closer to Obi-Wan and wraps his arms around his waist, hugging him and resting his chin on his shoulder.

Obi-Wan sighs softly because he knows he shouldn’t allow Anakin this, he should be punishing the man for what he had done, but he couldn’t deny Anakin anything when he was upset. He’d almost given in to his request to come with him on Mustafar over and over before he’d gathered up the courage to leave.

Obi-Wan cards his fingers through Anakin’s curly-blonde hair, “Has Sidious treated you well?” he finally asks the question that had played on his mind without rest, ever since he’d heard that Anakin had pledged himself.

Anakin lifts his head from Obi-Wan’s shoulder and meets his gaze, “Of course. He cares for me.”

Obi-Wan feels a bubbling rage in his stomach at his reply because while Sidious may care for Anakin to some extent, it was certainly not in the way the younger man believed it be, he wasn’t the wise old mentor he’d posed to be for the last decade; he was a predator who’d preyed on a little boy. He collects himself and takes a deep breath, “Anakin, Sidious cares for you in terms of not wanting anything to happen to you, because you are useful to him. You are a tool, a _possession_.”

Anakin’s throat bobs with a swallow and he looks down at where his gloved fingers had started brushing back and forth over Obi-Wan’s knuckles, “How ignorant do you think I am, Master?” he says, but despite his chosen words, there’s no resentment in his voice, “I know Sidious doesn’t have good intentions. He’s a Sith after all.”

“Anakin, you are his apprentice. You are a _Sith_.”

His former Padawan stares at him, eyes glistening and his jaw clenches. He drops Obi-Wan’s hands and springs to his feet. Obi-Wan can imagine that if it weren’t for the force suppression collar around his neck, he would be confronted with the onslaught of Anakin’s emotions across their bond, filling the space around them. He knows that since his pledging to Sidious, and his slaughter of the separatist leaders, the young man’s connection to the force would be an utter mess, and his emotions even more so.

Obi-Wan watches silently as Anakin makes his way to the blast door, swipes his key across the sensor and leaves. The door hisses closed behind him and the room is cast into a still silence as Obi-Wan sits alone on the couch. He can’t help the disappointment that arisen within him for upsetting Anakin but he had wanted to see what kind of reaction bluntly stating facts would cause Anakin.

Swearing quietly to himself, he brushes one hand over his beard and scratches his scalp with the other, and finding his hair still wet from his shower, he stands and enters the ‘fresher again, collecting his towel and using it to dry his hair properly.

Once his hair is dry, he makes his way to the small bed and climbs into it. It only takes him a few minutes to fall into a deep sleep.

* * *

It’s a whole day before Anakin gets to see Obi-Wan again. Sidious was making a public appearance outside of the palace, with a large crowd and dozens of holocameras, so his Master had ordered him to stand at his side, not only for immediate protection should a threat arise, but to demonstrate to the public that he was devoted to and would stand by his Master.

After the appearance, Anakin had had to spend hours in the Sidious’ office with the old man going over his plans for the following weeks and his expectations of Anakin; he had a few contacts that he needed to follow up with in regard to the location of the remaining Jedi. Sidious had stated that while he’d allowed Anakin complete privacy in his chambers, along with Obi-Wan’s, he was expected to report any information that Obi-Wan gave him about the missing Jedi, or anything else that could contribute to the growth of the Empire, and that Anakin, in his words, had ‘the privilege’ of making all the decisions regarding Obi-Wan.

The most unsettling event of the evening had been when Sidious expressed his satisfaction with the darkness he could sense growing within Anakin since having pledged himself as his apprentice and the slaughter of the Jedi and Separatist leaders, still unaware that only one of those things was true. He was right though, Anakin had always been able to sense the darkness within him, what he and Obi-Wan always worked so hard to control and overcome, but in the past weeks, he was unable to deny that the dark was beginning to overtake the light. Before Anakin had been able to dwell on the comment for too long, to formulate an appropriate response, Sidious had changed the subject and told him he was free of duties for the rest of the evening and should go and see if Obi-Wan ‘will be more accepting of some attention’, and Anakin was quick to obey and exit the office.

Anakin regrets how he had behaved when he’d last been with Obi-Wan. The man was being nice, holding him and showing affection, then Anakin had gotten angry when he’d called him a Sith. Really, he shouldn’t have because it was true, he was in fact a Sith apprentice, despite his reasons, it’s what he was. He praises himself for managing to walk calmy out of the man’s chamber without yelling at Obi-Wan and saying things he certainly wouldn’t have meant, such as he’d done before, and instead when the training grounds and sparred with his saber for hours until the anger dissipated from his body and he was overtaken with exhaustion instead. He’d returned to his own chambers to clean up and change his clothes, then had every intention of going back to see Obi-Wan and apologise, but that’s when he’d been called to Sidious’ office, and was unable to leave until the early hours of the morning and by then, he was dead on his feet and knew that Obi-Wan would probably be asleep.

Now, he walks the halls to man’s chambers, holding two heavy textbooks and a few small novels in his arms. Obi-Wan was used to reading and researching on datapads but Anakin knew that the man was perfectly capable of slicing through them, even with any restrictions Anakin would have put on them, and he really couldn’t risk Obi-Wan running away again, so he would have to do with old-school physical books.

The door to Obi-Wan’s chambers hiss open and Anakin finds the man sitting on the couch, watching some reality holoshow. He looks over when Anakin enters, and his face remains completely neutral as Anakin places the books down on the small dining table before turning to face him.

It becomes clear that Obi-Wan isn’t going to be the one to start the conversation, so Anakin shifts on his feet nervously as he tries to think of something to say, “I’m sorry for leaving…” He eventually settles on, fiddling with his fingers, “I wanted to come back last night, but Sidious’ needed me.”

Obi-Wan nods, “What are the books?” he asks, and it bothers Anakin that the man barely acknowledged his apology.

“Just something to keep you entertained,” Anakin mumbles, “Bail was released today,” he adds a second later, having momentarily forgotten the most recent news that his Master had informed him with.

Obi-Wan is visibly relieved and he sighs softly, “Oh, good.”

Anakin nods, “Sidious decided he would probably be more useful to have alive in the Senate. He’s well-liked by the public after all, they won’t be silent if he was killed,” he tells him and then bites the bullet and sits down on the couch beside the man he wasn’t even sure was his boyfriend anymore.

He’d always hated the word boyfriend. It felt far too juvenile, temporary. His love for Obi-Wan, and the older man’s in return, their absolute devotion to one another, how the force sung around them whenever they were together, the word boyfriend could simply never match what they had together. He liked partner better, but even that couldn’t compare.

They sit in an awkward silence for several moments before Anakin reaches out for Obi-Wan, shifting to move closer to him, but the older man only moves further away in response, “Anakin,” he sounds tired, like how he does after they’d been on a mission for weeks or had just finished difficult negotiations. Anakin wants to pick him up and carry him to the bed, curl around him and keep him safe while he rests.

Anakin looks down at his lap, “I wish I could know what you were thinking,” he whispers, and his eyes begin to sting with tears at Obi-Wan’s rejection.

Obi-Wan replies surprisingly quickly, “Every time I see your face, I am reminded how I have failed you.”

“No, Master-“

“I have failed you,” Obi-Wan cuts him off, and he just sounds so _defeated_ that Anakin wants to hold him even more, “If I had been strong enough to severe our training bond before it evolved, If I had not given in to my own selfish temptations and allowed our relationship to become romantic, your attachment to me would not have been so intense that you’d fall to the dark side to save me.”

Anakin listens and when he moves closer to Obi-Wan again, the man doesn’t try to move away, “Obi-Wan, I would have done anything to save you long before I was knighted, long before we were ever romantic. I know the force made us meant to be together, Master. I don’t think anything ever would have stopped our relationship from becoming what it is,” his voice is a whisper as he leans in close to the Jedi Master, brushing their foreheads together and he can feel the heat of Obi-Wan’s breath against his cheeks, “I have always loved you, Obi-Wan. I must have told you that a thousand times now, will you ever believe me?” he punctuates the words with the gentlest of kisses the man’s mouth. Obi-Wan kisses him back for a few seconds, and Anakin swears he can feel the hurricane of darkness within him dissipate, the clouds parting to allow the light to peek through.

It barely lasts a few seconds before Obi-Wan pulls away with a start and jumps to his feet. He turns to face Anakin, and he’s surprised to find that the older man’s eyes are wet with tears, “I was never a first choice, Anakin. Nobody wanted me as a Padawan; Qui-Gon finally accepted me, but he gave me up when he had the chance, when he found you, because you were the better option, the chosen one, something more extraordinary than I would ever be.”

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin starts because he can see how upset Obi-Wan is, and he wants it to _stop_ , but Obi-Wan continues and Anakin realises he should shut his mouth because while he doesn’t know why the man has chosen now to have this outburst, it’s clear that he needs to get some things off his chest.

“I was knighted before I was supposed to be. I wasn’t ready, everyone knew that. I knew that. I was only your Master because Qui-Gon died, and you were so angry at first, that you didn’t get what you were promised, what you had uprooted your whole life for. You only latched onto me because you were a terrified child away from his mother,” Obi-Wan begins to cry silently, thick tears falling down his cheeks as his thunderous gaze stays locked on Anakin, and Anakin can do nothing but sit frozen and listen, “I was told after the fact that Ahsoka had been offered the choice by Master Yoda, when he’d come up with his little plan, if she’d like to stay assigned my Padawan, or become yours. She chose you,” for the first time in his life, Anakin can hear spite and jealousy in the Jedi’s voice, “One day I was told I’d have a new Padawan, and I was so thrilled to experience that again, and the next day she was gone,” he sobs once, “You wanted Padmé first, and now, you’ve left me for Sidious.”

Anakin balks at him and feels warmth trailing down his cheek, realising, after a moment, that he was crying too.

Had Obi-Wan always thought these things? Why had he hidden the pain he was feeling from him? He would have helped him, told him how wrong he was.

“Master,” Anakin starts, remaining where he sits, not wanting to crowd Obi-Wan while he was pacing nervously and acting like a cornered animal, “Those who turned you down as Padawan were idiots; you’ve turned out to be one of the best Jedi in the Order, and you know that’s true, despite our relationship. I know Qui-Gon must have hurt you, but I was never angry at you for his death. I was upset because the first man to come into my life that didn’t want to hurt me, was suddenly gone, and I hadn’t spent a lot of time with you before he’d died,” Anakin stands and approaches Obi-Wan, feeling a small victory when the man doesn’t back away from him, and allows Anakin to take his hands, “But I learned so quickly that you were good, and I was so excited, and so happy to have you as a Master. I would never change that.”

Obi-Wan whimpers quietly and collapses against Anakin, shoving his face into his neck as he clings to him, “Ani,” he whispers, and the name nickname, now so rarely used, makes Anakin’s chest ache and he holds the man closer.

“As for Ahsoka,” Anakin begins again, and he honestly hadn’t known that Ahsoka had been given the choice as to who she’d wanted as a Master, she’d never told him, “Her choosing me would have purely been based on the ignorance of a youngling who could only think about how cool it would be if her Master was the Chose One. Look how that turned out,” he swallows the sudden, thick lump in his throat, “She left the Order. If she were your Padawan, I believe she would have stayed. You would have been better for her. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about that since she left.”

Obi-Wan pulls back, like he was going to look at him, but Anakin doesn’t let him, holding him tighter, “Anakin, Ahsoka didn’t leave the Order because you were a bad Master.”

“As for me and Padme,” he continues, feeling Obi-Wan tense against him. He feels like an inconsiderate idiot for not realising Obi-Wan held insecurity about his relationship with Padmé, “I only wanted her because you were my Master and I thought I would never be able to have you. Our relationship lasted that mission on Naboo, and then it was over; we didn’t even sleep together, you know I was a virgin when we got together.”

Obi-Wan does pull back to look at him this time, and he frowns, “No. You said you’d never been with a man before, not that you’d never been with anyone before. I had assumed yours and Padmé’s relationship had been far more intense, that was the impression you gave.”

Anakin gawks for a moment, and he realises Obi-Wan is right. The first time they’d slept together, Anakin had expressed that he was nervous about receiving because in his words he’d ‘never been with a guy before’ and only ever used his own fingers, but he’d failed to express that he’d never been with _anyone_ before.

“I’m sorry, you’re right that is what I said, but I was a virgin until I was with you, I honestly thought you knew that,” he replies, and Obi-Wan shakes his head again, “Regardless, Padmé and I never had a real relationship, because my feelings for her weren’t real, and she could see it wasn’t what I really wanted. I’m sorry we’ve never really talked about this before, we should have. I should have been more considerate of how you were feeling.”

“I have never been as open with my emotions as you, Anakin,” Obi-Wan says, and Anakin suddenly feels the man’s touch on his waist, holding him, and it reminds him of how much he’d missed him.

Anakin suddenly feels the urge to cry, and his eyes sting with tears as he casts his eyes to the ground, “I’m sorry, Master. I should have been so much better for you.”

Gentle hands cup his cheeks, and Anakin follows Obi-Wan’s request and leans down to kiss him. He’s cautious and soft, but when Obi-Wan quickly deepens their kiss, he doesn’t hesitate in following the older man’s lead. He reaches around Obi-Wan’s waist and pulls him closer to him, so willing to take any form of affection the older man would let him have. He wanted whatever he would give him.

Obi-Wan separates from him and Anakin whines, holding him tighter, not ready to let go, “Take me to bed, Anakin,” he murmurs, and Anakin stares down at him in shock for a few seconds before the man’s request processes in his mind, and he grabs him by the hips and drags him over to the bed. Obi-Wan lays down, looking perfectly serene but Anakin can’t ignore the apprehension that he feels.

Is Obi-Wan only doing this because he thinks he has to? Because he thinks Anakin wants to and he needs to keep him happy so he won’t hurt him? because that’s not true, Anakin would never hurt him.

“I don’t need the force to recognise when you won’t stop thinking,” Obi-Wan says.

Anakin huffs softly, “I just… I need to know that you really want me, that you’re not-“

“I want you,” Obi-Wan tells him immediately and stands up from the bed and reaches for Anakin’s robes, untying them and pushing them to the floor before starting on the buckle of his belt. Anakin pushes away his apprehension and pulls his shirt off, exposing his skin to the chill of the room, and he makes a mental note to find him a small heating system. Anakin’s pants drop, his belt hitting the floor with a quiet _thump_ as Obi-Wan pushes him to lay on his back on the bed.

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin murmurs after the older Jedi pulled his boots off and then began to work on undressing himself. His eyes flicker over the perfect hardness of the man’s chest, the tone of his stomach. He wants to touch him so badly, run his hands over the coarse hair of his chest and lick the freckles scattered over his pale skin.

Once Obi-Wan’s clothes have joined Anakin’s on the floor, he climbs on top of him, straddling his hips and leaning down to kiss him, quick and lightly before pulling back and just looking down at him.

“What?” Anakin asks, feeling a flush rise on his cheeks. He always got self-conscious when his partner looked at him like that.

Obi-Wan sighs, shifting slightly, and Anakin manages not to swear when the man’s thigh brushes against his already full cock, “You are still the most beautiful creature I have ever seen, after all these years,” he murmurs, gentle hands brushing along Anakin’s collarbones.

Tears gather in Anakin’s eyes against his own will, and he grabs the older man’s hips to ground himself, feeling the warmth and softness of his skin. He and Obi-Wan had a regular and healthy sex life since they had first gotten together, and after so long apart that wasn’t for the sake of a mission, Anakin can’t deny that his desperation for Obi-Wan extended to his sexual needs. To have the man above him now, naked and touching him so sweetly as he called him beautiful, could be enough to undo him.

“What is it, dear one?” Obi-Wan asks, his voice calm and the fingers carding through his hair soothing, “Are you alright? Just as you asked me, you are not obligated to have sex if it’s not what you want.”

While Anakin would have done anything Obi-Wan had wanted of him, he wasn’t consenting to having sex purely because he wanted to keep the older man happy, as he had feared was the case for Obi-Wan, he truly did want him; he had merely missed feeling loved by him, and to have him how he was now, was overwhelming.

He wipes at his eyes and holds Obi-Wan with his organic hand by the back of the neck, pulling him down into a kiss. Obi-Wan’s beard scratches against his own clean-shaven face and he welcomes the tongue that prods against his lips. He pulls away after a few moments, only to shift to kiss along Obi-Wan’s neck, sucking gently with each touch of his mouth against the warm flesh.

“Please, Master. I want you, however you want me. I’ll do it,” he whispers, wetness gathering in his eyes again with his fretfulness, “I’ll be so good for you, I promise. I promise. I’m sorry-“

Obi-Wan hushes him and kisses him again before climbing off him, and Anakin whines loudly at the loss of skin-against-skin, scrambling to sit up as he reaches for the older man, “Calm yourself, Anakin,” Obi-Wan tells him, placing a hand on his chest and pushing him to lay down again, “I’m going to get the bacta from the ‘fresher.”

“What do you need bacta for?” Anakin croaks, rolling over to watch, eyes zeroing in on Obi-Wan’s backside as he walks.

“I don’t suppose you brought lube with you?” He calls, returning from the ‘fresher moments later.

“Oh,” Anakin replies, sighing in relief when Obi-Wan climbs on top of him again. He watches as the man clicks open the bottle of lube and squirts some onto his fingers, he’s taken by surprise, however, when Obi-Wan reaches behind himself. He doesn’t have time to say anything about it before the man’s mouth is on his again and after a few moments, he hears the quiet, slick noises of Obi-Wan’s fingers, making his cock ache. He wants to touch himself, but instead, he quickly slicks up his hand and reaches for Obi-Wan’s cock, stroking it slowly to ease the stretch, kissing Obi-Wan deeper and swallowing the quiet groan he makes. He wants to hear Obi-Wan make a thousand more of those noises, but for now, all he can do is keep kissing him, for fear that he’ll stop.

Obi-Wan shifts after a few minutes and sits up straighter, moving into a better position and calling the tube of bacta with the force that he’d discarded onto the bed earlier. He looks so gorgeous; hair messy from Anakin’s roaming hands, a red flush from his cheeks down to his neck, his large cock standing tall and red, leaking at the tip with his arousal. He watches as the older Jedi squeezes a generous amount of bacta onto his palm, and then reaches behind him, and Anakin swears loudly when the man’s hand wraps around his cock and strokes to thoroughly coat him in the slick.

Obi-Wan sits up higher on his knees and holds Anakin by his base as he slowly begins to sink down. Anakin uses all his willpower not to simply close his eyes and enjoy the feeling of the surrounding warmth because Obi-Wan wasn’t on the receiving end nearly as often as Anakin was, and it would have been a few months since he’d had anything inside of him, so he gently strokes Obi-Wan’s length in the hopes that the pleasure will ease, or at least distract him from the stretch.

The discomfort on his Master’s face slowly fades as he begins to slowly rock and Anakin knows quickly that he won’t last long, the sensation of Obi-Wan’s tight heat around him pushing him closer to the edge embarrassingly quickly.

“Master please,” he whines, and he has no idea what he’s asking for, but when Obi-Wan leans down to kiss him he decides that’s a perfect answer, and he reaches out with both hands, threading one into the man’s auburn hair and placing the other on his hip, holding tightly to aid him in his movements.

Obi-Wan licks into Anakin’s mouth, sucking on his tongue and then biting harshly at his bottom lip. Anakin hisses and feels a burst of copper taste on his tongue when he chases the older man into a kiss again. Obi-Wan allows him to do so for a few moments before moving away, sitting back, reaching behind with one hand to brace himself on Anakin’s thigh and quickening his movements, swearing as he does so.

A few minutes pass and Anakin realises Obi-Wan’s pace is faltering and the muscles in his thighs were beginning to quiver, no longer able to kiss Anakin due to the heaviness of his breathing. Aiming to take over, to give the older man a break to allow himself to continue to feel more pleasure than discomfort, Anakin begins to sit up and uses his grip on the older man’s hips to begin to roll him over.

Obi-Wan snarls and Anakin halts when the man’s hand lands on his throat, pushing him flat down on the bed again, “No!” he growls, suddenly looking and sounding so angry that Anakin freezes, “We’re doing this how I want it. You don’t get to dictate,” he tells him.

Obi-Wan had clearly been facing some inner conflict when it came to Anakin since he’d pledged himself to Sidious, which despite how much he hated it, he did understand. The man would move between being caring and affectionate, how he used to be, to looking at him with blinding anger and yelling at him. Now, was a perfect example of the Jedi’s constant changing moods around him, so Anakin takes a moment to collect himself and then meets Obi-Wan’s harsh gaze.

“Yes, Master, I’m sorry,” he says softly, going lax and removing his hands from Obi-Wan’s hips and placing them flat on the bed instead to show his submission, eagerness to do whatever Obi-Wan wanted, “I just thought you might need a break.”

Obi-Wan glares at him, and his hand slowly tightens around Anakin’s neck, “You should be grateful that I’m allowing you this,” he tells him, picking up his rocking again, in slow, long movements.

“Yes, Master. However you like. I’ll do whatever you want, I want to be good for you, my Master,” he whispers, moaning softly as Obi-Wan’s hand continues to tighten around his neck, slowly cutting off his airway and he feels so close to coming.

“Good boy,” Obi-Wan hums, and after a few more moments, releases the tight grip on his neck until he’s just holding him, “Touch me, I’m close,” he then orders.

Anakin does as he’s told and wraps his organic hand around Obi-Wan’s cock, moving it in time with the man’s thrusts down against him, “Please, Master,” he whispers, feeling the pleasure build within him and he’s painfully close to his orgasm, finding it incredibly difficult not to thrust up into Obi-Wan and chase it.

Obi-Wan nods then throws his head back, groaning low in his throat and Anakin feels the warmth of his come as it spills over his hand, and then watches as a few ropes spurt up over his stomach. He barely has time to appreciate the sight of Obi-Wan covered in his own come before his own orgasm overtakes him and he comes deep inside of Obi-Wan, crying out and holding onto Obi-Wan’s waist tightly, as if the man would fade away if he didn’t.

After a few moments of loud panting, Obi-Wan kisses him once on the mouth and climbs off of him, hissing as Anakin slips out of him. He collapses down onto the bedside Anakin, their sides knocking together. It’s only a small bed, not enough room for the both of them to be in it without touching.

Anakin takes a few moments to catch his breath before he stands, finding his legs still slightly unstable from his orgasm. He can feel Obi-Wan’s eyes on him as he walks to the ‘fresher, and it takes him a few moments to locate a cloth in one of the sink drawers. He wets it, then returns into the main chamber.

Obi-Wan watches silently as Anakin carefully wipes his stomach and doesn’t protest when Anakin carefully lifts his left leg to access his entrance, wiping away the come and bacta he finds there. He places the cloth on the nightstand, knowing they’ll probably need it later after Obi-Wan has laid still for a while. He lays back down on the bed, on his side and facing Obi-Wan, finding that the older man has closed his eyes.  
  
“Are you alright?” Anakin asks and cautiously places a hand on the other man’s stomach, feeling it rise and fall with each breath he takes, beginning to rub back and forth soothingly.

It takes Obi-Wan a concerningly long time to answer, and when he does, he refuses to look at Anakin, “I’m sorry. I should not have choked you,” he says weakly,

“What? It’s fine,” Anakin answers, scooching closer to his Master, “You’ve done it plenty of times before.”

“Our relationship is not in a place where can have the same kind of sex that we used to, Anakin,” Obi-Wan huffs, but nevertheless, lifts his arm to allow Anakin to curl against his side, his hand warm where it lands between his shoulders, “Don’t be ignorant. The trust is no longer there.”

“I still trust you, Master,” Anakin whispers, his lips brushing over the skin of the man’s ribcage and can smell the faint scent of sweat from his armpit.

“No, you don’t, and I don’t trust myself,” Obi-Wan replies, voice suddenly soft and choked as he sits up, throwing his legs over the end of the bed and running a hand through his hair, “Because when I had my hand around your throat, I thought that it would be for the good of the galaxy if I left it there and didn’t stop squeezing.”

Anakin pauses for a moment, and he finds that Obi-Wan’s confession doesn’t frighten him. He pushes himself up and hugs his true Master from behind, resting his chin on his naked shoulder, “You’ve never hurt me, Master. I don’t believe that you would. I know you love me, even if you’re struggling with it right now,” he tells him. He reaches up and gently cups Obi-Wan’s jaw, tilting his head to face his, and pressing their mouths together, kissing Obi-Wan tenderly before he whispers, “I would do anything for your forgiveness, Master, but I just need you alive.”

Obi-Wan sighs shakily and knocks his forehead against Anakin’s, and he says, almost defeatedly, “It will be alright, dear one. I need you, as much as you need me.”

Anakin swallows down the catch in his throat and kisses his him again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello welcome to chapter 4

The sun is warm on his skin, the light harsh to his eyes and the air fresh to his lungs. It’s quiet, not silent, but peaceful; Coruscant traffic can barely be heard from here and the trickling of the large water fountain is nothing for him to complain about. He’s sitting on the bench that circles the pool of the fountain, peering through the mass of lily pads to watch the colourful fish that swim below. The rooftop gardens of the palace are nice, but not as much as those back at the Temple. Though he supposes those would be overgrown now in the six weeks it had been since it had been evacuated.

“Obi-Wan.”

Obi-Wan’s trance is interrupted, and he turns toward the source of the voice. Anakin stands, fully dressed in dark robes but without his armour, hands folded over his lower stomach as he watches. He’s always awkward whenever he brings Obi-Wan outside, an hour or so a day for the last week, having come to an understanding (on his own) that it wasn’t okay to keep Obi-Wan cooped up in the small chamber all day.

It was two weeks now since Obi-Wan had been captured meeting up with Bail and brought to the Palace, under Anakin’s care. The first week had been difficult, Obi-Wan had been upset and all Anakin did was tiptoe, terrified to upset him. Obi-Wan had tried to be angry, to want nothing to do with the younger man, to refuse to love on him anymore, make him suffer for his decisions, but Obi-Wan was a weak man, and just as susceptible to his own attachment as Anakin was; while Anakin had pledged himself to a Sith Lord to try and save him from an imagined death, Obi-Wan couldn’t stop loving him.

“Yes?” Obi-Wan replies, a movement in the water drawing his attention for a moment, and he wishes he had some flakes to feed the fish.

Anakin pauses for a moment, and then joins him at the fountain, sitting down beside him and reaching for his face. The leather glove is smooth against his cheek, and he allows the touch. Anakin’s eyes, a blue so similar to his own, are flickering over his face nervously, “Would you like to mediate?” he finally asks.

“What?” Obi-Wan responds surprised, suddenly very aware of the collar around his neck again. It hadn’t been removed once since he’d arrived, which was understandable enough, he still couldn’t be trusted not to hurt Anakin and try and escape. He was beginning to become used to the weight of it there, but he still desperately longed to feel the force again.

“I can take the collar off for a while if you’d like to meditate, as long as you promise not to contact the rest of the Order,” Anakin tells him, his hand having moved from Obi-Wan’s face down to his arm, rubbing back and forth carefully, “I’ll have to stay, but um… you can still shield if you don’t want me touching the bond.”

Anakin’s offering finally properly registers with Obi-Wan and he nods frantically, clutching at Anakin’s waist and shifting closer, “Yes, please,” he says, “I would like that very much.”

Anakin nods and shifts, reaching into one of the pockets of his cloak and after a moment, pulls out a small electrical key. He stands up and moves behind Obi-Wan, gently resting a hand on the side of his neck as he begins the process of detaching the collar. Obi-Wan leans into the touch of Anakin’s fingers, almost vibrating with anticipation to be reunited with the force.

It takes a few moments, but the collar unlocks and Anakin slides it off his neck. Immediately, Obi-Wan feels a rush of the force around him, coursing through his body, in the space around him and the sheer intensity of it has him collapsing off the bench, Anakin catching him by his biceps and stopping him from falling on his face in the grass.

Obi-Wan can’t see, his vision blurred a milky blue, and he crawls across the grass on his hands and knees, away from the fountain, to the patch of grass, near the bed of roses he’d passed earlier. The force within him feels a storm of unbalance, but it welcomes him nonetheless, wrapping itself around his signature and dragging him into its energy. He struggles to ground himself, losing his grip on the reality around him, not noticing that Anakin had stopped him from crawling, and he was now simply sitting in the soft grass. Something familiar brushes against his signature, and he latches onto out of disorientation, and is quickly hit with a wave of anger, sadness, and desperation, and he recoils from it just as quicky, realising it was Anakin’s side of their bond, and he manages to gain enough comprehension to throw up shields against it before he sinks deeper into the force.

* * *

He doesn’t know how long he’s been mediating.

After the initial chaos and disorientation of coming out of being cut off from the force, he regained his control and had been unpacking his emotions, releasing them into the force and then searching it for answers as to the current state of the force, of the rise of Sidious and what sometimes felt to be a loss of Anakin.

He’d worn force suppression collars before and being released from them hadn’t felt as intense as this time had been. His only answer for initial reaction when the collar had been removed was due to how unbalanced the force within him had become since Sidious’ rise, and what he had relied on during the Clone Wars to stay balanced – his relationship with Anakin – was brutally damaged. With the current state of the republic, now the empire, the current state of his relationship with Anakin, and the ‘death’ of the Order, the necessity to stay hidden and quiet within the force, he can’t imagine the force feeling calm again, not just within himself, but the entirety of it. How could it when Sidious was clutching it in his lightning grip and feeding it darkness?

He’s vaguely aware that he’ll be pulled out of his meditation soon, that Anakin will have duties to get to, so he’s slowly bringing himself out of the deep meditation. Just as he’s beginning to focus on the trickling of the fountain again, he senses something within himself, and he moves away from the noise of the water, drawing in on the strange brightness within him. He can feel it thrumming, and he reaches out to a tiny, soft yellow orb, he brushes up against it carefully, and verbally gasps when he makes contact. However tiny, however weak, nearly non-existent, it’s a force signature.

In his sheer shock, he tears away from the orb and out of his meditation, blinking rapidly against the brightness of the sun as his senses come back to him. He feels like he can’t breathe, like there’s a stone in his throat choking him, unable to breath around it. He can feel his hands shaking.

“Oh, good you’re out,” he suddenly hears Anakin’s warm voice from somewhere off to the left of him, “Woah, hey, are you alright?”

Anakin squats down beside him, one hand on his hip and the other on the back on his neck, gently pulling him to look at him. His gaze is worried, and his lips and brows pulled in a frown. When Obi-Wan doesn’t answer, his thumb traces softly across his cheekbone, and then back into his hair, threading gloved hands into his hair and gently scratching his scalp.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan sighs softly, swallowing thickly and taking a moment to ensure his shields are tight and impenetrable to Anakin.

The younger man kisses him softly over his bearded jaw, “You okay?” he asks again, and then when Obi-Wan nods helps him stand. He kisses him again, once on the mouth, soft, and not long enough for Obi-Wan to decide whether or not he was going to respond before he pulled away again, “I have to go I’m sorry.”

Obi-Wan shakes his head, “No, it’s fine. I’d like to rest,” he murmurs, feeling the exhaustion settle into his bones.

“Okay. Uh, can you…” Anakin starts, and Obi-Wan watches as he pulls the suppression collar out of his cloak and he turns back around wordlessly. The collar engulfs his neck again, and just like that, his connection to the force is gone again. Once it’s on again, Anakin wraps an arm around his lower back and begins to lead him back through the garden.

* * *

Obi-Wan lays staring up at the ceiling of his chambers, the covers pulled up to his chest and wearing nothing but sleeping pants beneath them.

It was a few hours since he’d returned from the gardens, and early evening. He’d crawled into bed an hour ago, after finishing the meal that had been delivered by one of the servants and cleaning up, he’d decided that he wanted nothing more than to just go to sleep. It would be easier to forget that way.

However, despite how exhausted he’d felt since coming out of his meditation, he was unable to fall asleep. He’d tried to ignore what he had discovered, but he couldn’t. There was only one reason for a force sensitive to discover a small force signature within themselves: pregnancy. Obi-Wan was pregnant. He was a Jedi Master, pregnant with his former Padawan, and new Sith Apprentice’s child.

He had resigned himself to staying within the palace, with Anakin, and while his plan had been to stop Anakin from falling further to the dark side, to nurture the light within him until he could convince Anakin to leave Sidious’, to come with him back to the Order. Obi-Wan would make them accept him back, or if Anakin wouldn’t go back to the Jedi, they would go somewhere else, just the two of them, into hiding where they’d be safe, but now, it wasn’t just him and Anakin. He had a baby to think about.

A foetus really, if even that. There was no way it was conceived before Obi-Wan had been brought to the palace, the latest time he and Anakin would have been intimate before his arrival would be close to six weeks ago, and in that time, Obi-Wan had spent plenty of time meditating and exploring the force within himself, he would have noticed the small signature. He and Anakin had only been intimate twice since he’d come to the palace, and only once had Obi-Wan been receiving.

He had no doubt that Anakin would love his child, sacrifice anything for them just as he had done for Obi-Wan. His desperation to save Obi-Wan would increase tenfold, and Obi-Wan isn’t sure what lengths he would go to ensure the safety of the pair of them, as for Sidious, Obi-Wan saw two outcomes. The offspring of himself and Anakin would undoubtedly be strong in the force, have incredible potential, that much was already obvious with how early Obi-Wan had been able to discover the small force signature; Sidious would either eliminate the child so they wouldn’t become a threat, or do the exact opposite and groom them to become his next apprentice. He felt sick at the thought of either outcome.

He slides his left hand over his stomach and exhales shakily, eyes fluttering closed as he feels the warmth of his own skin and imagines what lays just beneath it. He and Anakin had briefly entertained the idea of having a family together, in some alternate universe where they’d met outside of the order in the early hours of the morning after a long mission, tired and loose-lipped, in some alternate universe where they’d met outside of the order.

As he cried silently, thick tears streaming down his cheeks, he vowed to get his child away from Sidious, to protect them. He eventually cried himself into a pitiful sleep.

* * *

The opportunity for his escape presented itself the next evening. He’d still been struggling to formulate a plan as to how to escape when he was restricted in the force, didn’t have his lightsaber, was locked in a chamber and constantly guarded whenever outside of it.

Anakin had joined him in his chamber to have dinner with him, stripping off his robes, armour and lightsaber off and leaving them on the couch as he joined Obi-Wan at the small dining table. They’d eaten together, Obi-Wan having found himself discussing an old mission he’d been on with Qui-Gon, then Obi-Wan had caught Anakin wincing, and after being told he’d had an altercation down on the lower levels of Coruscant earlier that day with an informant, Obi-Wan had laid him out over the bed and massaged the pulled muscles in his back. One thing had let to another and they’d had sex.

They’d laid together a little while afterward until Anakin had declared he needed to go back to his own quarters and write up a report for Sidious and then retire for the night. Obi-Wan had kissed him goodnight and watched him go, chest aching as he desired nothing more than to tell Anakin about the child. He’d laid in his own sorrow for a few minutes before rising to have a shower.

It was once he exited the ‘fresher however that he saw it; the shine of silver metal poking out from between the couch cushions. He’d pulled Anakin’s saber out carefully and inspected it, pondering. He put it back where he found it and then waited the next two hours for Anakin to come and collect it, having realised he’d left it behind when he’d redressed, but he never came.

He waited another two hours before carefully, one of the lower settings of Anakin’s lightsaber to limit the chances of slicing his own neck, cuts off the force suppression collar. His reunion with the force is much less intense as it had been hours ago, and he only needs a moment to gather himself. He moves to the ‘fresher and inspects his neck; he finds there’s a light pink bruise lining where the collar had sat, and only a minor graze where he’d cut it off, and he quickly slathers bacta over it before making his way back to the blast doors.

There was no longer a guard stationed outside his chamber as there had been the first week, however, he reaches out in the force to be sure. The nearest guard he can sense is a floor above him, so he ignites Anakin’s lightsaber, smiling ever so softly when he finds it’s still blue. He sucks in a deep breath and begins cutting through the blast door.

* * *

Obi-Wan charges through the streets of Coruscant.

He had no idea how long it would take for someone to realise he had escaped the palace. He couldn’t risk taking a speeder from the hanger back to the base, he knew there wouldn’t be any that didn’t have trackers, and he couldn’t imagine the number of guards that would be stationed there; so with the help of the force, and his own agility, scaled down the side of the palace and then snuck into the streets.

He was shielding himself in the force, not even risking reaching out to Windu or Yoda. He was only just exiting the palace district and hadn’t bothered to try and evade the security cameras; he didn’t have the time, all he could do was avoid the guards and _run_.

He eventually finds an unattended speeder and climbs into it, it sputters worryingly to life, but he finds it flies and it’s certainly faster than it would be if he continued to run all the way to the other side of the city. He already felt like he was going to throw up and the running certainly wasn’t helping.

He only reaches out to Yoda when he’s a few streets away from the base, and sighs in relief when he feels a welcoming, urgent brush of the force.

He finds two clones stationed outside the entrance instead of inside, waiting for him, and one is quick to grab him by the shoulders and shuffle him inside while the other mounts the speeder to dispose of it.

“Welcome back, sir,” the clone, which one he isn’t sure, says once they’re inside.

“Thank you, trooper,” Obi-Wan replies, evening his breathing to try and calm his barrelling heartbeat, “Now, if you’ll excuse me,” he pats the trooper on the shoulder and makes his way to the elevator.

* * *

Obi-Wan had been left alone for the first few days. The other Jedi allowed him to wallow in his own emotions without question; the younglings avoided him and even Cody left him be, save for making sure he ate and slept, and to tell him there had still been no word from the other Jedi scattered across the galaxy. There’d all gone into hiding, which was good.

However, after a few days, Obi-Wan began to calm down, realising that his escape was successful, otherwise Anakin would have stormed in here and collected him already, and the other Jedi, especially the council, started to take less pity on him.

“General Kenobi,”

Obi-Wan peers over the side of his bunk, finding Rex, looking up at him, “Oh. hello, Rex,” he says, moving to sit up.

“The council is requesting you for a meeting,” Rex tells him, taking his arm to help him climb down the bed.

Obi-Wan nods his understanding. He’d been expecting to be called to a meeting since he’d arrived back and was honestly surprised that they’d waited so long to call on him. He bid Rex a goodbye and made his way through the base to the small meditative area that acted as a council meeting place.

The blast door hiss open and everyone turns to face him from where they’re sat in the standard circle on the old meditative mats, “Hello, Masters,” Obi-Wan greets and steps over to one of the empty mats, sitting down and crossing his legs.

The council meetings were often emptier than they used to be during the War, members spread across the galaxy on missions, fighting battles. However, then, their locations were known, unlike now when they had been forced to go into hiding and they had no idea where they were, how many of them were still alive, and who had been captured like Ki-Adi-Mundi. Before him now, only sat Masters Mace Windu, Yoda, Shaak Ti and Kit Fisto.

“Alright, are you, after your time at the palace?” Master Yoda is the first to acknowledge him.

“Yes, fine,” Obi-Wan replies, “I wasn’t harmed, or kept in a cell.”

“It was Skywalker who ordered your capture, yes?” Plo Koon asks.

“Yes, and the condition was I was to not be harmed.”

“What happened on Mustafar?” Mace asks, staring intently at him from across the table, “The only reason I did what Vader asked and told him where you were was because I trusted you would be able to gain control over your former Padawan.”

Obi-Wan clenches his fingers into the material of his pants, “Do not call him, Vader. He is Anakin,” he growls before taking a deep breath, attempting to release his anger into the force, “We merely had a discussion. He was begging for my forgiveness, to come with him back to Sidious. I tried to have him come back with me, but he was inconvincible. I escaped,” Obi-Wan explains, staring at his own hands as he suddenly remembers every word that was spoken between them over a month ago on the shores of Mustafar; when anger and betrayal raged through Obi-Wan and he felt the despair of losing his Padawan for the first time.

“You could have ended this,” Mace says, and Obi-Wan’s eyes snap to him, “If you had of killed Skywalker, it would have significantly weakened Sidious’ power. The danger of the two of them together will be catastrophic!”

“How dare you?” Obi-Wan hisses, getting to his feet and the rest of the council does the same, like they’re ready to be on the defensive should Obi-Wan’s anger overcome him, “How could you ever expect me to do that? He is my Padawan! I could never kill him!”

“Something else, is he?” Master Yoda asks gently, leaning heavily on his cane and as Obi-Wan looks down at him, he realises how much the Grand Master has aged since the War had begun. The war had tired them all, but Obi-Wan had never realised how much so in Yoda’s case.

Obi-Wan’s heart pounds in his chest, Master Yoda reciting the code to him and a group of Padawan’s as younglings ringing in his ears. He relaxes the hostility of his body language, and he can’t bear to look down at the old Master, shame filling him and making nausea swirl in his gut, “After Anakin was knighted, I was weak. He didn’t want to sever our training bond, and I wasn’t ready to let go, so I didn’t. As the War only got worse, that bond intensified as we continued to find comfort in it, it’s now a complete force bond that allows us to communicate depending how physically far away from each other we are, with telepathy.”

“Those kinds of bonds are strictly forbidden under the code,” Kit Fisto spoke, frowning deeply, “They are the strongest form of attachment.”

“I know.” Obi-Wan could feel the weight lifting off his chest as he’d spoke, the long held secret of the Clone Wars finally airing, “After a long time of pining, halfway into the War, Anakin and mine’s relationship became romantic and we have been together since.”

Master Windu sighs loudly and Obi-Wan watches as he rubs at his brows, “The council has had our suspicion regarding yours and Skywalkers relationship in recent months.”

“Worse at hiding it, the two of become,” Yoda chimes in. He had sat down again.

“Though a horrendous violation of the code, we knew that there was no way we could win the war without the pair of you. We decided that we would wait until the end of the war to address it.”

Obi-Wan feels suddenly hurt at realising that the council had had meetings without him being present, to discuss his own misconduct. He’d worked so hard to prove himself as a good Jedi, to earn his rank as Master, his place on the council, and he had ruined it.

“Very few people were aware of our relationship. We knew it had to remain a secret so we would not be exiled from the Order.”

It’s quiet for a few moments before Windu sighs heavily, “On the night of the evacuation, when Va-Anakin,” Obi-Wan winces as Windu barely manages to catch himself from calling Anakin Vader. He wonders is everyone was calling Anakin by the name Sidious had debuted him with, “Brought me back to the Temple and he told me to evacuate the Jedi, I asked him who’s side he was on. He told me yours. What does that mean? Why did Anakin fall to the dark side?”

Obi-Wan thinks his answer over for several moments, “Anakin has struggled with tendencies toward the dark side ever since the loss of his mother, but it was merely an inability to control his emotions, I never once feared he was in danger of falling,” he says, and he feels terrible about disclosing such a private thing that Anakin had confided in him about, that they had worked so hard together to overcome.

“And yet, he has,” Master Ti supplies.

Obi-Wan shakes his head quickly, “No, he has not fallen to the dark side entirely, not even mostly. I will not deny that the darkness is growing in him under Sidious’ influence, but he is not a true Sith. He did not fall of his own will, not really,” he begins to explain, “A few months before all this, he began to have nightmares of what he described to be my brutal and painful death, similar to the visions he had of his mother. I tried to convince him they were nothing but dreams, I’d spent hours searching the force with him trying to find any sign, but there wasn’t anything. Nor have I experienced my own visions of my death. Unbeknownst to me until Mustafar, Sidious had told Anakin of an ancient Sith power to save people from death, and that if he pledged himself to him, he would teach this power to Anakin.”

“So, Anakin joined the dark side and become the apprentice of the Sith Lord responsible for the Clone Wars, to save you from a death he has no confirmation is destined to happen or not?”

Obi-Wan almost winces at Windu’s tone, “Yes. Unfortunately.”

“This is a clear demonstration as to why relationships are forbidden under the code,” Windu begins, and he sounds absolutely furious, “Look at what it has done to the two of you!”

“The code has been wrong for a long time,” Obi-Wan replies quietly, forcing himself to look the older man in the eye, “I thought that long before Anakin. You would not find one Jedi who doesn’t have some form of attachment, someone they love. We are still people, and no matter what we preach, we cannot shut off our emotions,” he says. Windu looks absolutely appalled, “I know Anakin and I are attached, and that has proven to be dangerous, but love for a partner, is what kept me going throughout the War, and I would not still be in the order if not for my relationship with Anakin.”

His words allude to him having left the order if not for Anakin, but that wasn’t the case. If he didn’t have Anakin to return to, his love, his care, his own for the man in turn, he would have taken his own life long ago. He would never tell them that. He had never told Anakin that.

The Masters are silent for a few minutes, and it’s Kit Fisto who sits down next, joining Master Yoda and Shaak Ti, “You propose to love without attachment, without fear of death or loss, to enjoy the time we have with a person, and rejoice when they re-join the force.”

Obi-Wan stares at him, the weight in his chest easing as he stares at the Nautolan, _someone understands._

“Hardly the time, to discuss changing the code, it is,” Master Yoda says tiredly, “Dangerous, Anakin is. A danger to Obi-Wan, he is.”

Windu nods his agreement, “Whether or not Skywalker would ever hurt you-“

“He wouldn’t,” Obi-Wan interrupts firmly.

“You are in danger as long as he is under Sidious’ hold.”

“Agreed,” Shaak Ti chimes in, “If Anakin becomes unwilling to follow orders, Sidious could very easily use you as a tool to have Anakin cooperate.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Obi-Wan responds, and sits back down now that the conversation has gone from hostile, to calm once again, “Especially given recent developments.”

“Recent developments?” Fisto prompts.

Obi-Wan feels uneasy again, trying to stop the mess of his feelings become known to the others as he pulls his robe around himself like it would protect him from what he was about to reveal, “I wasn’t going to try and escape,” he reveals, “I was going to stay, where I could watch over him, protect him, and I hoped, that could make him see that I would be _okay_ , that his visions would not be a reality, and we could escape together, come back to the Order, and if you would not accept him, we’d just go somewhere together.”

Windu huffs, and finally, joins the rest of them and sits down on his meditation mat, “What changed, Obi-Wan?”

Obi-Wan swallows thickly, “I had to wear a force suppression collar, for obvious reasons. But the day of the night I escaped, Anakin took it off for a little while so I could meditate. As I was meditating, a sensed something within myself, and I investigated it. I quickly discovered it to be a force signature,” he flickers his gaze around the room, watching the realisation come over their faces, “I’m pregnant,” Shaak Ti, sitting beside him, places a hand on his knee and squeezes softly, “Anakin would never do anything but love his child unconditionally. He would be overjoyed to know he’s going to be a father, but I couldn’t risk my child being at the hands of Sidious.”

“Idea of how far along, you have?” Yoda asks, completely neutral to the news Obi-Wan had revealed.

“I would have fallen pregnant while I was at the palace. I would have sensed it sooner otherwise.”

“Being able to sense a force signature that soon, speaks volumes of how powerful your child will be,” Mace finally says, staring off thoughtfully.

“Exactly,” Obi-Wan agrees, resisting the urge to rest a hand over his stomach, “If Sidious knew… he would either kill them so they wouldn’t be a threat, to him or his hold over Anakin. Or, he’d wait, and take advantage of their abilities once they were old enough to learn to manipulate the force.”

“What to do, the decision, is yours, Obi-Wan,” Yoda tells him.

Obi-Wan nods his thankfulness, “I will do what is best for the safety of my child, once I realise what that is.”

* * *

The base is loud that evening. The noise of the Cafeteria that night, thousands of them all packed together eating and talking over their meals, ignoring the holos that played strung from the roof above them. He’d left before he was even halfway along the line to be served food, heading back to the stairs and making his way back to the sleeping quarters of the base. He sits down on the bottom bed of his bunk, where a Jedi he barely knew slept beneath him, and bowed his head, tangling his hands into his hair and slowly falling into a light meditation.

That’s how Cody finds him, gently shaking him out of it with a hand on his shoulder and encouraging him to sit up straight before slipping a tray of food into his lap.

“Thank you,” Obi-Wan murmurs, picking up the plastic spoon and dipping it into the stew. He was starving, had been when he’d headed down with everyone else to get dinner, but couldn’t bear the business of the Cafeteria, preferring silence to filling his stomach.

“Of course, sir.”

“Have you eaten?” Obi-Wan quickly asks.

“Yes, with Rex before I collected your ration.”

“Good then,” Obi-Wan replies, continuing to inhale his food. It’s still hot, burning his tongue as he shovels more in, but he doesn’t care.

“Are you alright, General?” Cody asks after allowing Obi-Wan to eat in peace for a few minutes, his voice full of concern as he watches him, “You were gone for two weeks.”

“I’m alright,” Obi-Wan confirms, gathering himself and taking smaller, slower mouthfuls of the stew. It’s pointless if he only throws it back up again, “I wasn’t harmed.”

“I didn’t mean to suggest General Skywalker did, sir,” Cody is quick to reply, and Obi-Wan shakes his head to ease him, “I don’t need to have the force to know something isn’t right.”

Obi-Wan allows himself a small fond smile at his Commander’s perceptiveness, “I’m pregnant,” he tells him. He’d told the damn council after all and would have to eventually face the repercussions of that, he could tell one of his closest friends.

“Oh… Congratulations,” He drawls after a moment’s hesitation.

“Thank you,” Obi-Wan replies, not truly believing that congratulations were in order, but he wouldn’t say that to the clone.

“Do you… have you been to see a healer?”

“Not yet no,” Obi-Wan sighs, “I hadn’t thought of that yet. I only discovered it the day I returned.”

Cody is quiet for a moment, “I can go with you, if you’d want.”

_Because Anakin isn’t here to._

Obi-Wan hates the sudden sting in his eyes, and he quickly blinks them away. He reaches over and squeezes the clone’s shoulder as it’s void of his usual armour, “Thank you, Cody. I appreciate it, but I think I’ll be alright. I’ll go in the morning.”

* * *

The medical area of the base is small, and not designed to house more than a few patients. There’s one shared room with five recovery beds, an office/testing area, and a single private examination room that Obi-Wan was currently in. It was lucky enough that the exam room held an ultrasound machine, intended more for examining internal injuries or issues than pregnancy, but here he was.

Master Che suddenly squirts gel onto his stomach, and he winces at the coldness of it as her fingers begin to spread it over his toned stomach. He watches as she does so, mentally envisioning a time when his stomach will be larger, a bump that visually showed he was with child.

Vokara chuckles, “Sorry about that.”

“No, it’s alright.”

Master Che picks up the wand. She’d already taken some blood that she’d sent off with one of her Padawan’s to test, “Now, you claim to be two weeks pregnant at the absolute most, so I’m not going to be able to see the foetus this early on, but the blood test should confirm the pregnancy and we’ll use the ultrasound to inspect the condition of your uterus.”

Obi-Wan nods his understanding, “Yeah, that’s fine,” he replies. He’d known it would be too early for a medical appointment to be much use, but he knew he’d have to go anyway, to tell Cody and Rex (who Cody had requested to inform of the pregnancy so Obi-Wan would have some extra protection) that everything was okay as far as they knew.

“You had your yearly full-body examination last year, and your reproductive system was in complete working order then, but things can change in a short time, so we’ll just do a quick examination again, just to give us some idea if we need to take some extra precaution.”

Obi-Wan nods his understanding and watches the grey blur on the screen that is his insides as she begins to move the wand over his flat belly, “Oh, I’ve been wondering,” he suddenly remembers what had been on his mind for the past few days, “I’m not due for my next contraceptive injection until next month. It should have still been effective.”

Master Che frowns, meeting his gaze for a moment, “Yes, that’s right. That is odd,” she says, “That form of contraceptive is extremely effective, with less than zero percent of not functioning as intended. It was developed especially for the Jedi, of course we also then made an effort to distribute it to sex workers, and after Knight Skywalker’s outburst in that council meeting as a teenager, to planets with slave culture,” Obi-Wan listens as she rambles on, waiting for an answer as to how he could have become pregnant when the injection was supposed to eliminate the need for other protections against pregnancy.

“Master Che?” He finally interrupts.

“Yes, sorry,” she says, smirking a little and he winces as the wand presses down on his full bladder. It was the worst part about his yearly ultrasounds – the horrific ten minutes where he had to resist the overpowering urge not to wet himself at the pressure of the wand – but he understood that it made it easier to see his organs, “The only time the injection has been confirmed to fail when other, more powerful drugs have been used to overpower it. But I trust in the last month you haven’t been on the receiving end of any nasty drugs?” She asks and continues when Obi-Wan shakes his head in confirmation, “Well, then I honestly cannot tell you how you’ve fallen pregnant.”

“The force works in mysterious ways,” Obi-Wan murmurs, finally tearing his eyes away from the screen, accepting he won’t be able to see the foetus.

Master Che hums, “Yes, I suppose. There have been a few Jedi that claimed it to be the reason for their pregnancies, but it can’t be confirmed.”

“I’ve never heard such a thing,” he says. There hadn’t been a public scandal about a pregnant Jedi since Anakin was still a Padawan, the Jedi leaving the Order to raise their child.

Master Che hums, “Well, pregnancy is not against the Code. Jedi that fall pregnant, and choose not to leave the Order with their child are sent on what’s publicly known as extended missions, while instead they travel to a small, secluded planet that specialises in housing and caring pregnant persons. They give birth, hand the child over to the Creché, recover, and then return.”

Obi-Wan blinks in surprise, “Oh wow, that’s a helpful organisation,” he says.

“Yes, it’s had very high success rates. It’s just not disclosed to those outside of healers, and those that fall pregnant when they’re told all their options. Of course, after birth, the Jedi are offered therapeutic services and if they regret their decision of handing over the baby, are able to reclaim their parenthood and leave the Order.”

“I suppose I don’t have that option,” Obi-Wan sighs.

Master Che prods firmer against his bladder and he winces, “Well, the facility is still running, it’s not just not safe for you to travel as a Jedi. The current state of the Order definitely limits your options in terms of secrecy. However, you can of course, abort the pregnancy or carry to term and hand the baby to the Creché.”

“Thank you,” Obi-Wan says, but shakes his head, “However, those aren’t something I can do. This is my child and I will take the responsibility of carrying it, raising it.”

Vokara smiles softly, “Yes, I did suspect that would be the case,” she says, and draws the wand away, hanging it back where she’d gotten it, “Your reproductive organs are still in perfect condition, and by the initial examination, should provide you with a healthy pregnancy. I’ll perform another examination in a few weeks to have a look at the foetus, until then I’ll have the blood work confirm it, but if you sensed the force signature, that’s the purest way to confirm the pregnancy.”

“Thank you,” Obi-Wan tells her, propping himself up on elbow as she begins to wipe at the gel over the stomach.

“However, it is curious that you’re pregnant to begin with.”

Obi-Wan hums, an image of a small baby with blond hair in orange arms flickering behind his eyes, and he smiles softly, “Anakin is the son of the force. Perhaps it wanted a grandchild.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chat to me about the fic on my tumblr @iiloulouii - i'd love to hear from you. anon is on <3

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos & comments are greatly appreciated & inspire me to write me! 
> 
> My tumblr is @iiloulouii if you'd like to come & talk about this fic. 
> 
> Thank you for reading <3


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